One direction preferences

Your dad steals your phone and texts him

HARRY~ (Text)

Your dad/ your phone: hey baby, can I come over? ;)

Harry: If you want, what's with the ;) ?

Your dad: Because I'm so horny ;)

Harry: babe, I know, I am too. But I told you we're waiting till at least our honeymoon. :)

Your dad: Harry, this is (Y/N)'s father. I think your the right one for my daughter. She always talks about you and I know now you'll treat her right :)

LOUIS~ (text)

Your dad pretending to be you: babe, come over please, I'm ready. ;)

Louis: what are we gonna do? ;)

Your dad: it involves you and me in bed, with the lights off. ;)

Louis: omg, your not serious!

Your dad: but I am. I want to hear you pant and scream. ;)

Louis: omg! When did you get the new glow in the dark stickers!?

Your dad: baby, shut up. You know what I'm talking about. ;)

Louis: baby, I don't want to hurt you. I want to wait till marriage. Knowing my luck, I'll probably get you pregnant.

Your dad: you might be a goofball but you make my daughter happy. Please be careful in the future with her and don't hurt her Lou, I knew I like you for something. :)

Louis: wait? Mr (Y/L/N)? So wait, you texted all those things? O.o

Your dad: yes, I'm very happy with you. :)

Louis: this conversation, just got awkward. O.o

NIALL~ (text)

Your dad acting like you: I need you, baby please.

Niall: I'm on my way.

Your dad: WHAT!? fuck no! I don't ever want to see you around my daughter ever again! Niall your done with her! Done!!

Niall: Mr.(Y/L/N), I promise we wouldn't do anything like that. She always texts me first when she's on her period. I thought she it was a little early, but I'll do anything for her when she needs it. I would never take advantage of you beautiful daughter. She's perfect and I was going to ask you a very important question in a couple days. I'm sorry if you think I would do something like that. If you still don't believe me you can ask (Y/N).

Your dad: oh my gosh I'm so sorry Niall. Your right normally when she is sick like that she's always hugging her phone. What was your question?

Niall: since me and (Y/N) have been dating for awhile, we are both twenty-five, and I'm certain she's the one, Mr. (Y/L/N) may I marry (Y/N)?

Your dad: of course. You seem really sweet and caring so, yes you may marry (Y/N). Good luck and you can ask me anything. Welcome to the family, son. <3

ZAYN~ (text)

Your dad: Babe, I need you. ;)

Zayn: what for? :/

Your dad: I think you know. ;)

Zayn: No obviously I don't. >:(

Your dad: SEX!! SEX ZAYN I WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH YOU!!!!

Zayn: No, I told you before. I'm not a virgin, and I know you are. I'm not going to do that to you, especially when were not married. If we get married, then we will. Every night until we have kids, okay?

Your dad: kid, you should get a medal for that! This is (Y/N)'s dad. I think your perfect for (Y/N)! Welcome to the family.

LIAM~

Liam: Hey babe, remember last night? ;)

Your dad (confused but takes it wrong):

Kinda, can you refresh my memory? ;)

Liam: how could you forget? You kept screaming.

Your dad: I think I remember, Were we in the dark?

Liam: Duh, that's kinda the point.

Your dad: I thought it was pleasure.

Liam: Not really, some people don't have a good time.

Your dad: Really, I thought it was fun.

Liam: Yeah, your not good. I am though. XD

Your dad: what the hell?! Liam what the fuck did you and (Y/N) do last night?!

Liam: Laser tag

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Omg! By far Liam's was the best! Ahahhahaha! I don't know what the hell happened but I guess I fixed it! I guess i had writers block on Liam. I hope you like it because I thought Liam's was hilarious! Well, I hope you like it!

Funny moment of the week:

(Me and my mom shopping at the mall for Sydney's birthday present)

Me:( wandering away from my mom)

My mom: ( a couple isles away) Oh my god they have Louis!!

Me: (ran over where she screamed) what the hell mom?!

My mom: ( holding a birthday card with Louis on it) they have Louis!

Me: mom, of course they have Louis. It's just a card. It's not the real thing.

My mom: Oh dear god if it was the real thing, I would be arrested.

Me: What would you do?

My mom: Kids your age shouldn't know.

Oh my god! Louis run! Just run! Take Eleanor and just run! Go to a island that's hasn't been discovered yet! Something! My mom is crazy! If you see a fifty million year old lady with a Louis shirt run! I repeat RUN!! lol she's crazy but she was just joking! Love ya Louis and the rest of 1D! Thanks for reading! Daysxxxy