Lost

29

Beatrice Prior

There's nothing that compares to the feeling of emptiness- emptiness in my bed, I mean. Al is gone, hopefully forever. Though he left marks on my life- and my skin, actually- I believe that I am fully capable of handling myself.
But Tobias.
Oh Tobias- The name makes me smile and giggle and do anything that makes me happy.
He's gotten so handsome, and much more muscular. I shouldn't be fantasizing about him; I just got out of a relationship.
But these feelings won't leave me. The bright moonlight shines through the window, and as I stare up at the ceiling, moving in my bed, I'm tempted to find him. He's probably not even thinking about me, but I can't get my mind off him. I shove away the thought and try to replace it with thoughts of sheep hopping over wooden gates.
But suddenly, his face is on the sheep. I sit up and rub my eyes. I get up, throw on some slippers and a coat, and head to Christina's place.
I knock on her door.
When she opens a minute later, I ask to come in.
"What happened this time?" She asks, her shoulders sagging, thinking I'm still with Al. I can see her eyes drooping, nearly closed. I know she has a lot of filming to do tomorrow, but I needed to see her.
"Nothing, I broke up with Al"
Her eyes suddenly go wide, "Really?"
Her eyebrows lift.
I smile, and she invites me in, and instead of heading straight to her bed, she flicks on the lights, and pulls out two hot cocoas.
"What happened?"
"I was just tired of his, excuse my language, shit. So I just did it"
"Then why are you here?"
"I need Advil"
"To sleep?"
I nod.
"But I thought...."
"I can't stop thinking about Tobias. He won't get out of my head, and I need my sleep. My tour starts it two days"
She smiles at me, "Tris, this is good"
Her voice is full of all these things: Pride, happiness- and it makes me warm on the inside.
"I know it's most certainly better than being beaten"
She smiles, "Are you tired?"
"Honestly? No"
"Let's turn on the radio" she suggests, opening an app on her phone.
Suddenly, a man starts to speak from the phone, "Here we have Mirrors by Justin Timberlake"
I smile. Me. It's me. I helped him write the song. I smile when I listen to the song. Justin is actually a good friend of mine, and I have his number. I text him, "Your song is playing again"
He doesn't respond of course, he's sleeping.
And among Christina's words boring me, I fall asleep on the couch.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"So, your favorite color is black?" I ask Tobias.
"Well, yeah" he says, "It's the only thing I wear"
"That doesn't mean it has to be your favorite color"
"Touché. But I do like the color black"
I smile, taking a sip of my coffee, "And in contrast, I love white"
"White?"
"Yup. It stands for potential. I think of white like a blank page"
"Interesting" he says.
His eyes divert from mine, tracing the floor. His elbows are pressed against the table. Right before he speaks, his eyes flick up to meet mine, "So, I'm just wondering how you're feeling"
I look up at him at him, "Why?"
"I mean, you just broke up with Al"
I shift in my seat, and then lean back and sink into my seat. I cross my arms over my chest.
"I don't think I ever really loved him, which was why it was so easy to let him go" I say, my eyes glued to the patterned carpet of my hotel room. The both of us are sitting on the couch of my hotel room, talking. We've been trying to get to know each other, since we've missed many experiences of each other's lives.
"I see" he replies, trying to hold back a smile.
"Well, off of that subject, my tour starts in tomorrow. After that, in three days, I'm headed to Washington. Then along the east coast, and-"
"Wait, your leaving?" His eyes widening.
"That's typically what happens when people travel. They have to leave at some point" I say, straightening up in my seat.
"I just...I just didn't think it'd be so soon" he says, scratching the back of his neck.
"Yeah. Well, the tours gotta go how it has to go" I say, standing up to get a water to wash down the coffee.
"Umm. Well then. Would you like to go out tonight?"
I whip my head around to look at him. So many feelings swirl around me and I'm unsure of how to respond. Go out? I mean we've only known one another for a few days and before that only a week- My face is heated, and my heart beats faster. I clear my throat before I ask.
"Like a date?"
"Yeah. Like a date" he says. I can't tell if he's nervous or not. He's sitting casually, but I swear I can hear his heartbeat from here. Or may be that's my heartbeat.
"I think I can make that happen. Fancy? Or Casual?"
"Fancy. Kind of cliche. But I know you and know you like Cliche" he says, smiling.
I smile back, and sit back down in front of him, "How'd you know me so well?"
He simply shrugs. Refilling my coffee, he says, "Any shows you want to watch?"
"Like, TV?" I ask, surprised.
"No, like, Broadway show"
I raise an eyebrow, "A Broadway show?"
"Yeah. Like, Matilda or Les Mis or something. There's also this new Hamilton thing at the public theater." He asks, smiling.
"Umm. I don't know" I say, "I didn't think of seeing a Broadway show"
"You're in the greatest city in the world, Tris" he says, "How can you not see a Broadway show?"
I shrugged.
"If you don't have a preference, I'll pick for you"
My face lit up, and a smile crept it's way to my face, "Wait we're going to see one?"
"Yeah. That's why I asked" he says, smiling.
I uncross my arms and pull my knees close to my chest, "Um....I don't really have one"
"That's okay. I'll think of one. I'll be here around six, since all plays start at seven. Sound good?"
"Yeah, perfect" I say.
As son as he stands, I stand. He says, "I have to go. Duty stuff"
I shrug, "It's all right. Thanks for taking an hour out of your busy schedule for me"-
He suddenly takes my hands, and holds them, rubbing his thumb over my knuckles. His bold movement makes my heart leap, and he says, "There'll always be time for you, Tris"
I smile, as he lets go of my hand and leaves the room, he says, "See you tonight"
I could've sworn he said something after that, but he was already out the door.
Sorry for taking so long, guys. I just have so many things on my mind. Thank u guys who continuously reminded me to update, you're awesome. I don't have any more prewritten chapters, so it might take a while to update. I'll try as best I can, and with your support, may be I can update faster.
Thank u guys.