The Difference

Chapter 1

What had I done?

I sat on the hard, cold tile inside the dark attic. Dad always puts me here after he whips me when I do something bad. But I never remember what I do wrong.

He usually whips me with his hands, but this time he used his belt, which means I did something worse than imaginable.

I could still feel the hard slashes across my back. I couldn't see them, but I knew I had large red marks where he hit me.

The attic was freezing, because our AC unit was up here. I curled up my body into a little ball to try to stay warm, and to pass the time, I destracted myself by saying things about myself.

My name is India White.

I'm 13 years old.

I live in Los Angeles.

I have a younger sister named Catalina.

She is 7 years old.

I call her Cat for short

I am in 6th grade.

My mom works a full time job as a travel agent.

She's never home.

I've grown up alone all my life.

Nobody likes me.

I wish I didn't exist.

I started to cry because of the horrible life I had. Why me? Why any of this?

I felt like I was going to throw up, but I knew very well that I didn't eat enough to. Dad never fed us. I always snuck food for Cat and I.

I think dad wanted us dead as much as I wanted myself dead.

He always wanted a boy. But instead, he got 2 girls. I wonder, if I were a boy, if he would abuse us.

Just then, I heard the creak of the attic door opening, and looked up to find Cat at the door in her nightgown. How long had I been in here?

Dad threw me in here at about 4:00, and I got out an 7:38. I was in there for roughly 3 hours and 38 minutes.

I ran up to Cat and hugged her tightly. We walked downstairs together and Dad was passed out, drunk on the couch. Probably good for now.

I lead Cat to her room, tucked her in, told her goodnight, and crawled into my own bed.

My eye lids were able to find it easy to shut, and I was almost instantly asleep.

Falling asleep was my favorite part of the day, and I wished that I would never wake up.