Santana Lopez-Orphan

Chapter 20: The Talk

As you can probably tell by now, my life has been very... Eventful to say the least. But I didn't plan my life out like this. This floral diary I have in my growing hands, is where 13 year old Santana Diabla Lopez lives. She spoke to me threw my words, and I remember what I once forgot.

That diary talks a lot you know. She's very honest, and her Spanish writing is ever improving. She told me so much in a few short hours that might as well be minutes. Me and Brittany had it all sorted out. We where going to get married on a sandy beach, looking all elegant. Married before 25! Even now that very important to me. Britt in a white princess dress, we watched so much Big Fat Gypsy Weddings back then, and me... Looking as sexy as possible.

Age 30... Three kids, Broadway, sex (I was a virgin back then), to get my mama out of trouble... I sooo wish I could of done that.

My eyes are pouring with oceans of water. I'm cradling Maria in my arms, I hold her like she's my own, well she is my own now. She's my baby sis, forever and always.

School

I hate it! Literally, hate it! The lessons are getting harder, Glee, Cheerio's, there the only people that even attempt to be nice.

Maths = moaning, from Ms, "Your late" or "Stop looking so Effing miserable, It's not like someone's died or something." And the worst thing is, she knows about my situation.

English = bad mouthing every soul in that dingy classroom, "Hey soccer face, move that ball you call a face out of the way, your blocking the board," I can barely read and write in Spanish, you could send me to England and I still wouldn't be able to read a thing. Sir normally gives me warnings but I stop before the third... most days.

Science = detention within the first five minutes, my science teacher is so racist agents Mexicans because they killed her whole family or something. I'M FROM HONDURAS! I have tried telling her this but she keeps throws racism and some test tubes literally at my face.

History, is ok. But that is only because Mr Shue is my teacher. 

And those are all my learning lessons, well apart from Spanish but, I'd rather not talk about it.

Home Life

Has always been a "tad" awkward. But since World War Three literally let loose in my house, I've been struggling to cope. A LOT!!! But lately I've realised that I have such amazing friends. Brittany, the love of my life, things are still a little foggy but she's been really helpful planning the funeral. It's going to be on the one month anniversary of my parents death.

Glee is my world right now. Gees, I never thought I'd ever say that. Not to get into too much detail but the guys have been extra helpful. And the girls. There so sweet with Maria.

My biggest concern right now though... MARIA!

I've always known that my little princess would be unique, but not like this... Now, to understand this properly, I'd have to take you on a little journey back in time...

Ok, I tried renting a tardis but Dr Who has been permanently renting it for the last 600 years. Basically, long story short, my Mama might as well of been on 'I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant', because one minute I was talking to her whilst she was shaving her legs, and the next Maria's head was crowning.

Don't get me wrong, she's only 5 and a half months old, but something is still... I don't know? Her old day-care would always be really mad because she just didn't progress. I'll just wait and see.

Right NOW!

Walking around this lovely park, don't ask me what it's called I couldn't read the sign, sitting on a wooden bench that hasn't yet given me a splinter, spoke to soon. Forget I said that.

"Santana..." Oh gosh, it's Brittany. Why do I feel so nervous? I can feel my heart beat out of my chest.

I feel the need the swallow the golf ball in my throat, "H, h, how did you know I would be here?" the golf ball is now a basketball, sweat is now tears, quiet is now screaming because Maria wants her bottle.

"Find my friends," I always forget about that app, "I'm really worried about you San. The only conversations we've had since Boxing Day was about the funeral, you've been extra feisty at school and, and..."

"I know," I can't even look at the one I love. I feel so guilty. Maria's being a good girl today, I can feel the milk she can't swallow go around my hand but I don't care, she rarely drinks this much in one sitting. At least she isn't making a fuss about going into her new buggy, "Thanks for the new buggy by the way."

I can feel her smile now, she's edging closer to me now, "Aw thanks. Hay, isn't that the pond where the old buggy sank to the,"

"Yes," I sigh, "Thanks for taking all the bags of the titanic before it sank to the depths." Why am I laughing? Probably because Brittany's laughing.

"Look, Santana, I want you to know," Oh god, she's sighing, "I know this situation isn't ideal," YOUR TELLING ME, "I'm gonna be here for you every step of this bumpy journey, and I will always love you and... Santana don't cry! I don't know what to do when you cry?"

"H, hug me B, b, Brittany!"

And once again, were in each others embrace, forever and always...

Wow! You guys are amazing! 1.4k is a number I never thought I would get! Thankyou!