Santana Lopez-Orphan

Chapter 7- Teen Mother

TRIGGER WARNING!!!

2:31am, a extremely early Wednesday morning...

I can't take this anymore! My body is trembling with anger and tiredness, my heart is beating outside my chest, the only thing I can hear are sharp screams that burst my ear drums. I'm shouting, no, SCREAMING, cursing, all because I can't take it anymore. I'm stomping up and down the hallway, tripping over the now broken floorboard, which isn't helping me in my time of rage. I want to throw Maria out the window! I've tried everything with that girl, I gave her a bottle (which she threw at my chin), she hasn't set off a poo bomb, she doesn't want her blanket or sleep and I'm pretty sure she doesn't want me.

I rush into my room, slamming the door behind me, back leaning against the splintery wooden door, just, slowly sliding down onto my bum and... huh, my window is open, might as well close it. As I'm walking, I feel, strange. I walk faster, and faster, and FASTER towards my tall window.

What's happened? I've blacked out. My eyes are shimmering open sleepily, Oh My Gosh! Pure panic is rushing threw my body, I start to speak to myself slowly and a bit crazily, "I'm half way out the window, I'm half way out the window," I'm slowly rocking my body back and forth, back and forth whilst I'm sitting on the windowsill. I can feel the fresh morning breeze hit my bear legs as I feel the nothingness beneath them. I feel... scared. Me Santana Diabla Lopez, scared??? "Gotta jump, gotta jump." What's happening to me? I've gone loopy. Well I wouldn't be loopy, if it wasn't for all Maria's screaming. Why am I edging out of the window?! Half my body is in nothingness. I'm now screaming like a crazy person, "WHY PAPPA! WHY DID YOU KILL MY MAMA?! MAMA HELP ME, PLEASE JUST, HELP. I WANT TO DIE, PLEASE GUIDE ME TO YOUR EMBRASE. LET ME FALL OUT OF THIS WINDOW," It's a good thing I have no neighbours. I'm drowning in my own tears, wondering why I can't just, jump.

Maria's cries get louder, so my cries get louder. All I can think about is Maria, from the first time I held her, to two weeks ago when she held my pinkie for the first time... "I need help," My voice is trembling as I fall backwards onto my bed. I fall to the floor, crawling to my school bag to search for my phone. I can barely stop shaking. I take another journey through my school bag to find, "gg,ggot ittt," My voice, my body physically shaking. I'm holding Mr Shue's number with one hand, whilst slowly dialling the number with the other.

I've had another black out! The phone call, walking to Mr Shue's apartment, a blur. "Three more flights of stairs to go, Oh, why did the lifts have to be out of order???" I'm in jeans and my red sweater, thumping up the stairs until, finally, made it. Will opens the door before I reach the doorbell. I never thought I would do this, but I let go of Maria's pram and leaped into his embrace. Holding me tight, whilst he whispered soothing words into my ears.

...

Thursday?!? 12:01pm

"Where am I?" I grown in a teenage style fashion.

"Do you not remember what happened this morning sweetie?" Emma says softly, sitting down beside me whilst rocking Maria.

"I remember everything until I got hear." I reply, grabbing my sister from her. "Are you happier now baby," I say in my best baby voice, staring softly at my baby girl. "Emma, did I tell you what happened last night, I can't remember?" She nodded, and recalled everything I said to her and Will. Unfortunately for me, I told them everything. 

I get up whilst she's talking and place Maria in her pram.

"Wait, please don't leave Santana, I want to help you," Emma says rushing towards me.

I tern around to her and tell her the truth, "I have to get home before the detective arrives to get forensic and video evidence," and that was 100% true... If you ignore the fact that there coming tomorrow, but why dwell on the details.

Emma waves me off as I leave what I desperately need, Love...