I Was Meant To Be Yours

Candy Store

Dear Diary,

Ding ding ding! You were wondering how my day went, weren't you? Because I would never write BORING stuff in my diary so that if someone reads it they will always have a good laugh... Nice one.

Actually, today was the most normal one I've had in a while.

McNamara decided to speak to me again, but she seemed... Different. Some jock groped her in the hallway and she didn't scream bloody murder. Heather spent lunch putting on makeup and ignoring her food. She bought it and threw it away a second later.

I'm worried about her, of course, but I decide to just let a few things slide for right now (I don't have the authority, patience, or strength to deal with a depressed McNamara).

I focused on Martha today and tried to get her to eat some green beans. It was like talking to a toddler; the endless pushing, the deals, and an agreement to take her to a party.

I was not planning on going to this Friday's drug-fest party; but I was willing to do it for Martha. Besides, if she was going, I was going to watch her like a hawk to make sure nothing R-rated happens (God, I feel like a middle-aged mother...)

She said that we could go dress shopping tomorrow... Hooray.

Ugh, she knows I would do anything for her; we're like each other's spirit animals.

Well, after school, I decided that I needed to eat my feelings (1. Because of Martha's whole thing, and 2. Because JD hadn't said anything to me all day...)

I went to a candy store two blocks away. When inside, you feel as though you're in some sort of licorice haven where no one will judge you.

I lunge for some chocolates until my hand meets a chubby hand. It was Martha. So much for me worrying about her eating problems (even though she's just eating crap).

I ask her to come over to stuff our faces together and we spend a nice afternoon eating crap.

Then, Martha just had to remember the party and asked me to go shopping with her.

Why can't I say no to her?