Save Me

Chapter Eight

I woke up early, surprisingly, and decided to start on breakfast. I looked through Bens' bag and found a list of allergies. Thankfully he was just lactose intolerant. I put the bacon on a pan and put it in the oven before getting out beans and eggs. Normally I would put milk in with the scrambled eggs, but with Ben I didn't want to risk it. I popped some toast in the toaster then checked the bacon. Once the beans had heated up I plated everythin then went to get the boys dressed.

"What do you guys want to do today?", we were sitting aorund the table in the kitchen. Luca had been shoveling food into his mouth like nobodies business, while Ben just swirled the beans around his plate while occasionally biting his bacon.

"Can we go to a park, mummy?", Luca asked when he had finally finished eating.

"Ben, do you want to go to a park?", I asked gently, he had been quiet since he'd woken up. He shrugged one shoulder and finished eating his food.

When I had everything washed and put away I wrapped the boys up in their coats and took them outside. We walked around for a bit, until Ben recognised the street and lead us to the park. I lifted the both of them onto the swings, per Luca's adamant request.

Ben soon got bored with the swing and moved over to the slide, but Luca demanded I push him higher. I kept watch over Ben while pushing Luca.

A little later I had both boys run towards where I had made myself comfortable on a bench. "Mummy, can we get some food, pleeeeaaaase.", Luca dragged out. 

"Oh I don't know.", I smothered a smile at the disbelieving faces. "I suppose so, what do you want?". We left the park and walked towards the main street.

"Pasties.", Luca chimed in.

I looked at Ben and he nodded. It was weird how Luca was the more confident one out of the two, especially with everything that had happened. But the again Ben was around unfamiliar people without his mother. 

I'd managed to convice the boys to eat actual meals for lunch so we were back at the diner. We had just had out food placed in front of us when my phone started ringing. It was one of the few posessions of mine I had been able to bring.

"Hello?", I asked cautiousy, I had  to answer just in case it was Natasha. But I was terrified it would be Ethan.

"Phoebe? Hi, how is Ben?", I sighed in relief at hearing Natasha's voice.

"Hi Natasha, he's fine. A little quiet but he's been playing with Luca all morning.", I told her.

"Good,", she blew out a sigh, "Can I talk to him for a sec?", I handed Ben the phone, telling him who it was.

Luca had managed to spill beans all over himself and the table while I had been distracted...for less than a minute!! I grabbed a handful of napkins and tried to clean up the mess. I felt a gentle tug on my sleeve and looked down to Ben handing me the phone, a few tears shining in his eyes. 

I left Luca to play with the rest of the mess and took the phone. I pulled Ben onto my lap and hugged him while Natasha spoke.

"Thank you for watching him, I shouldn't be gone long. Dad broke his ankle falling over in the garden. I don't know why they didn't tell me if wasn't that serious over the phone, but my mother always did have a flare for the dramatics.", Natasha rambled.

"He's okay though?", I stared at Luca in a mix beteween disgust, embarrassment and resignation. Leaving him to get himself covered.

"He's fine, I should be back home tomorrow. Mum is going to stay with him as long as she can, but he will probably be discharged within the next two days.", we spoke a little more then hung up.

"Mammy should be home tomorrow.", I told a still upset Ben. I looked up to Luca and cringed, he had rubbed mashed beans on his face.

I set Ben down and rifled through my too big bag for a spare t-shirt. After pulling one out I picked him up and took him to the bathroom, Ben following me silently. I cleaned him up as best as I could before slipping on the clean top. 

I paid for our meals then left, hurrying away as the waitress glared at me for the emss. I had left her a tip as a sorry. We wandered around for a bit before Luca got tired and fell asleep in my arms.

That night after tucking both boys into bed I headed for the bathroom and filled the bath with slightly hot water. As soon as I'd gotten settled I started crying, you know those tears you get where you're still okay, but your body wants to cry? Yeah, I had that. My body wanted to cry and my mind was calling me stupid. But pretty soon I started to cry deliberately, huge sobs wracked my body, large tears streaming down my face blocking my vision.