Hiraeth: A Collection of Poems

Pressure

There's a noose around your mind
It's pulled tighter every day
The things that you're supposed to love
Shouldn't bring you this much pain

You follow all the standards
These assembly lines of lies
They tell you what to do each day
And ignore your bloodshot eyes

They show you how to fit in with the rest
Your own needs are not important
It's hard to look in mirrors
When the image is distorted

So you wander to the bathroom
And give back what you just chewed
The others flaunt their bodies
But all you feel is used

They insist that you must find yourself
But if it's not lost it can't be missed
Things will not get easier
Says the red lines on your wrist

So you take another swig
And ignore what you should face
The second bottle burns your throat
You're convinced you like the taste

Another night you can't remember
It used to be so fun
Surrounded by your many friends
Now you're the only one

A younger girl approaches you
As you take another drag
She asks you why that's your escape
You just tell her that you're sad

She goes home to her parents
And confesses that she saw you
They say you're going nowhere
She tells them that she's sad, too

A while later she wanders out
And finds you passed out in the park
She sees your box of cigarettes
And lights one in the dark

Your mistakes do not define you, they say
As they judge your every move
But you might as well continue
You have nothing left to lose 

They tell you you're not thinking straight
That your mind isn't where it should be
But how can thoughts be right or wrong
If you're supposed to be free

So they send you off to take some pills
But still you feel so small
The idea of death itself, perhaps
Is the most addicting drug of all