Second Chance

Chapter 9

There's something known among the cancer world called "the last good day." It's basically when cancer patients who are about to die have a really good day, with random bursts of energy and more happiness than usual. That day for Kenzie was fast approaching, and I looked forward to it. The only thing was with this day, we were just so much closer to the end. The very end.

*~*

The end of school had come and gone and we were a whole month into summer. We were also a whole month into Kenzie's given time for living.

Kenzie was doing worse in more ways than ever. All her hair was gone leaving a pale, bald head. I could see all of her prominent, purple veins emerging from her skin due to the fact that she was so skinny. I don't know if you could say she weighed sixty pounds. Her hair couldn't grow back, because she was so skinny and malnourished. It was just sad to look at her.

The doctors had given up on treatment and sent her home to rest. That was all they could do. The end was near.

She wasn't coping well. Kenzie was hardly ever awake and when she was, I would hear her stomping, or really just walking with force, (she didn't have enough energy to stomp) around her room out of anger. Usually, I left her alone to get her frustration out but I should have known that something bad would amount from it.

I was downstairs going over my solo for the weekend. It seemed like when all else failed, dance helped me escape everything. Midway through a turn sequence, I heard a series of crashes from upstairs.

I was home alone, so it was up to me to decide how to handle the situation.

At first, I figured I should let her be, but the longer I waited, the more thumps and crashes and loud noises I heard.

"That's it, I'm going up there," I said to myself.

I sprinted up the stairs and barged into Kenzie's room to see something I never thought I would ever see in my whole life. Kenzie was standing on a chair under her ceiling fan trying to tie herself to the fan. She was trying to hang herself.

"KENZIE!" I screamed and ran to her, lifting her off the chair.

I held her in my arms as we sobbed together.

"WHY!?" She bellowed, dragging it out as she screamed. Her whole body was shaking an all I could think was, what if I hadn't come up here? Or what if I had come just a moment later?

"Kenzie, Kenzie," I whispered. "Look at me." I held her face tight with my hands and looked her right in the eye.

"Why? Why would you do this?" I asked her. She tried to avert her eyes but it was impossible. I was holding too tightly.

"Why me, Maddie? Why did this happen to me? Just two months ago I was my normal self, dancing and going to competitions. And now... Well look at me!" She gestured to her body and stared down for a minute.

"Maddie," she looked me in the eye and stopped crying. "It's over. It's all over."

I collapsed in her arms and for once, it was her comforting me.

"You're too young for this, Kenz. You should be out with your friends, doing annoying, little kid stuff. But, you aged thirty years in two months. You shouldn't have had to that. None of us should have had to go through this. But you're not, you aren't- it's not okay for this to happen! It's not, NOT okay with me!!!!!!" I cried into her arms as we lay together on her small bed.

"I can't lose you, Kenz. You're my little sister, and I- I love you so much," I stared up into her eyes as I cried, silently this time.

"Why don't we get more time?" I asked her.

"It just doesn't work that way, Mads. Not for us. Lets just be grateful that we have each other now, okay?"

"When did you get so wise?" I softly smiled. She just shrugged and smiled back.

"I'm at peace with what is going to happen, Maddie. It's gonna happen, I know it. And I've accepted it. And the only reason I tried to do, to do all this," she gestured to the chair. "Is because I wanted to have control over how it happened. Just one last thing, you know? But, I guess it isn't gonna work that way."

I stayed silent, but pressed a kiss to her cheek.

"I love you so much, Kenzie."

"I love you more."

*~*

Kenzie came down to breakfast the next morning. Everyone was overjoyed, and absolutely thrilled but we tried to hide it. We tried to act like a normal family, even though everything was far from normal. Greg and my mom went off to work after they pressed long kisses to our foreheads.

As they walked out the door, I heard Greg whisper to Mom,

"Is this the last day, then Mel? She's actually up."

"I don't know, Greg, lets just be grateful that both of the kids are down here eating with us, even if it's the last time."

*~*

Kenzie ate half of her omelet then slowly cut every piece of it with her fork to make it look like she finished.

I cleared the dishes after everyone left and stared at hers.

"Wasn't good?" I asked lightheartedly.

Kenzie shrugged and half smiled. "Fine."

We were quiet as I scrubbed the dishes clean.

"I wish I could help, you know." Kenzie spoke up.

"I know," I sighed. We resumed our quiet peace.

I came and sat down across from her at the table.

"You wanna go back to bed?" I asked her.

"Can you make me a promise?" She ignored my question.

"Sure, anything." I responded.

"When, ya know, it happens. The end, I guess... I need you to promise me that you'll stay strong. For Mom and Greg and all the girls and Abby and everyone and mostly, me."

"I don't know..." I drifted off.

"Maddie, come on, you promised!" Kenzie begged.

"Okay, okay," I relented. "I promise.

"Thank you." She sighed. "Bed now?"

I nodded and smiled but when she turned away, I muttered under my breath, "I have a bad record of keeping my promises with you, Kenzie."