Diana - A 1D FanFic

Chapter 13-State of Distress

I lay on my bed, hiding under my covers, hiding from all my confusions and my thoughts, hiding from my missed messages. I'm confused. My fingertips are cold and I feel lightheaded. It's been a while since I've felt this way. Weak, sad, vulnerable. 

Why is it that at the moment I begin to feel something nice for someone, everything has to go wrong? Am I really that overly hormonal that I must be overly attracted to two men at the same time? Must I make my barely existing love life overly complicated?

I groan angrily and lift the covers over my face. It's been 3 days since Harry caught me. I haven't really hung out with him or Niall , and I think they've begun to notice. However, I don't want to do anything that would lead them on when I'm still unsure of the way I feel about either of them. 

 Niall, he's everything I could ever ask for, but I can't help but wonder what it would be like to kiss Harry, the same way I've kissed Niall. But in my mind I know that I like Niall so much better, but what if Harry is the one and not Niall and I let him pass by, but then what if it is Niall and he leaves me because I'm thinking about Harry, and then they both leave me alone.

I sigh, I relax and come to the conclusion that boys suck.

I have no idea what to do. I don't think I like Harry in that way and I'm not sure. 

These are the moments when I miss my mom the most. I 'm sure she would always know what to say and how to make me feel better, not that grams doesn't help me, but sometimes a girl needs her mom, so I turn to the next best thing.

To:Liam

Hey, wanna hang out? :)

I get up from my bed and make my way to the kitchen to make myself a snack. As I slice an apple my phone dings.

From Liam:

Be there in 10 

I know Liam is always there for me and maybe he can help me with my struggle. 

Oh my gosh, what if Harry isn't even interested in me? What if I'm freaking out for no reason?

I'm an actual, physical, conceited idiot and I actually have to calm down.

 I finish slicing my apple and grab a jar of peanut butter.

**************

 Once Liam arrives we sit on the dining table doing our math homework. Liam has a habit of obnoxiously tapping his pencil against he table when he doesn't understand something, that's how I know that he needs my help. I look over at his paper and see that he's already solved all his equations. Damn.

 This is a personal problem. I hate when Liam has personal problems, he never has them, but when he does, he gets really depressed over them.

"What's wrong Li, you seem anxious?" I say. He looks up at me startled, surprised I've even noticed. He sighs and looks over at me with a small smile.

"No big deal, just little things" He replies quietly. 

Oh gosh, this is a really bad one, damn.

"What is it? I want to help" I urge on, praying that I'll actually be able to help.

"Are you and Niall serious?" He asks with a solemn expression on his face.

What? 

1) Why does he care?

2) Why does he think we're serious?

3) Am I turning red?

4) Are we serious?