"ttyl?"
"i'll be waiting."
~| ttyl |~
"To talk or not to talk, that is the question. To smile or not to smile, that is the question. To be or not to be, that is the question." A pink-haired girl flopped onto a mattress, holding a paperback book above her face. "To love or not to love."
A ringing startles her, and she drops the book onto her face. Wincing, she picks it up and reaches for the phone that had caused the ruckus. "Hello?" She asks, rubbing the spot that had been hit.
"Hi, Sakura!! So I just wanted to know..." The babbling begins and the pinkette is dragged into a world of things she hardly understands, and for now, the questions she had been pondering before are set to rest, and her mind is filled with how to solve those-oh-so-despised math problems. Sighing, she lifts the phone closer to her ear.
"Yeah, Ino? You still there? Okay, so for problem eighty-seven..."
"but all the most popular people have them!!"
"when was i ever included in the popular group?"
Sakura wakes up to sunshine streaming in from the cracks of the curtains, and her first thought is of him.
She loves him very much. He is her reason for waking up in the morning, her motivation to live. He will love me one day, she tells herself. Every morning, she says it to herself in the mirror. He will love me.
Always followed a quick murmured, and I will love him back.
A few months pass with this ritual happening every morning, until one day she talks to her loved one. They talk, after first period in the transition time to second, (she always makes sure she leaves the room the same time he does) about meaningless things. She knows he doesn't remember them, but she knows that she will. And to her, that's the best thing of all.
Another school year passes, and another summer break is spent without seeing his face. Over this particular break, she thinks about the memories they share, and how important they are to her. The first time they ever met was when they both signed up for the before-school math programs. We were on the same team, but I didn't like him then. If I had, I would have stayed. But I quit, because waking up early was just not my thing.
Back then, he was decent. Just a classmate.
And then Iruka-sensei seated us all together. Me, Ino, Naruto, Kiba, Hinata, Tenten, Neji, and Sasuke. It wasn't awkward at all. This was the last month of school seating, and we went crazy. The first lunch we all had there, Naruto broke the ice immediately. He was joking around with Sasuke, and they were talking about abs and to prove to the world (who knows why Naruto did this, but to him I will be grateful. It was an important moment to me) and lifted up Sasuke's shirt. Everyone laughed, and from there we became the loudest table ever.
We all got along spectacularly. During math we laughed and giggled and whispered, and during literacy we made fun of some of the words. It was the best month ever, and disappeared all too fast.
Two weeks before we were all best friends.
Two weeks after that and then I fell in love.
When school starts again, Sakura had had time to ponder upon her feelings. Now, she is shy and has regretted very often at how bold she had been at certain points in time. When she gets to school and sees him, she avoids eye contact and walks away, hoping he doesn't see her.
When they get to first period, she unpacks quickly and can't help but shoot a look at him from across the room (old habits die hard) and sees him looking at her. This makes her feel warm and happy but she was over him so she looks at her stand, pretending to be absorbed into her music.
Her heart is pounding and she can barely hear the teacher when he calls for silence.
A few weeks pass with these awkward, vague encounters. She can't help but look sometimes when she hears his voice or hears his footsteps echoing across the pavement. It takes all her self-control not to rush packing or vice versa just so she can walk with him out of the building. She wants to open up, and letting him go is the first step.
One day, Sakura gets a permission form for a field trip. Contrary to all her old habits, her first thought is not about him (of course, he follows as runner-up but still. That's an improvement on its own), and she is glad for that. It shows her the progress she has made.
"i'm not going to make a messaging account"
"but how am i supposed to talk to you outside of school?"
"phone"
She drives to school and waves goodbye to her parents, who drop her off every morning. Walking in the direction of the entrance, she greets the classmates that she knows, and avoids the ones she doesn't. It is not a typical school day today, and Sakura is excited. The field trip is today, and she quickly double-checks to make sure she has everything.
After her examination, the students are filed into the gym for the group break a parts. She listens to the names and picks up his (habitually) and then down the list hears her own. We're in the same group, she thinks. Her mind is saying no, but her heart is fluttering and she's flying and what an amazing feeling and she can't help but be happy about it. She tells herself not to get too overexcited (because remember what happened last time...?) and looks forward to watching him.
Once they are dismissed, Sakura finds one of her older friends and they decide to sit together on the bus. Down the aisle, they decide to sit at a seat, only to have him right behind them.
"Oh, Sakura." Oh no.
"S-Sasuke-kun."
"Remember that show we used to watch?"
"Yeah, I do." Her face lightens at the fact that he remembered something about her, and suddenly they slip into all of their old routines and habits, laughing and teasing and poking and smiling with and at each other. It was like nothing had ever happened, like it was all the same.
Her friend and Sasuke's friend begin to talk as well, which makes her happy. All four of them resume talking to each other, and the feeling of bubbles Sakura gets in her stomach is so perfect that she never wants to let it go.
When they get off the bus, Sakura is almost sad but then she remembers that they will be together the entire day and there was still the bus ride back. So she smiled and walked forward into the day with confidence, enjoying every moment she spent with him.
Her faith was restored, as well as her love. She smiled for real and it had been a long time since the last time and enjoyed her day, and all too soon it was time to go.
As the students piled back into the bus, Sakura and her friend wanted to sit with them again. Peering into the back of the bus, she saw his dark hair; and also saw the cram-packed seats around them. Sighing, (and resisting the urge to cry) the duo sat down where there was an availability, hoping for the best.
Sakura rubbed at her eyes, until someone poked her shoulder.
"So who's your favorite character?"
"Why are you here?" She was shocked to say in the least. Had he switched seats for me?
He shrugged. "'Cos I felt like it. But anyways..."
Sakura smiled, and allowed herself to be dragged into the conversation.
