GALAXY

Chapter 14

It was dark outside. The black cloud was in front of me. "What's wrong?", my aunts voice sang softly. "I'm worried about Neona. She's addicted to cutting. I'm afraid she'll hurt herself at the point where I'll lose her." The shadow sat down next to me. We had created a kinda language with signs. "Don't worry. It's okay to be scared", it's hands told me. I smilled but it knew I faked it. It could see it trough my eyes. Nobody was ever able to read them. I sighed softly and turned the music on. I wanted to ignore the reality and forget the world. Tears were hiding inside my eyes. The war inside of me was too much to take. I've been keeping it a secret 'cause nobody needed to know. I couldn't count on anyone and I didn't want Neona to worry about me. It felt like I was drowning in my own sadness. This was so hard, no escape from my demons. My parents were downstairs. Tears slowely showed they were alive and runned down my cheeks. My hands covered my face. I felt a hug from the shadow. It rubbed my back gently and carefully. I cried on it's shoulder. My heart was so broken. All the emotions I was holding inside of me slowely came out of a million tears. Why did faith hurt so much? "Why are you crying so much, dear Galaxy?", my aunts voice sang softly. I was sobbing. "I don't want to hold on to lies. Nobody's there for me when I'm down. Who will make me fight, save me from meself when I'm not worth it? I can't do this anymore. I wish I never opened my eyes again, lying death in the ground right now." "Cry it out, kid. It's okay to be sad. Life is hard and unfair. Tomorrow is another day full of other changes. Keep on going. I know you're able to, strong warrior." Her voice kept singing a bit till it fade away, calming me down. The grip of the shadow got tighter. It's breath stroke my neck softly. "I believe in you", it said with it's hands. "I know you do, I don't", I whispered on a low tone. Tears rolled like unending waterfalls. "I'm sorry for being alive...", I spoke while crying meself to sleep. Dreaming about my own death and a future that would never come.