I'm in love with you, don't you see? (Niall Horan love story)

Chapter 13

Clary's P.O.V

Niall left and he promised he was going to call me as soon as he made it home and i'm starting to get worried because he left yesterday morning and he still did not call. Anyways I know he will call soon, he wouldn't leave me without any reassurance. I'm sure he is fine and that he just fell asleep once he got there. 

It's been a month now, and I have had a few people ask me on Twitter and Facebook, even on Youtube if I was the one dating Niall because the boys are dating my cousins. I was so tempted to say yes one day but seeing Lisa coming to my house crying her eyes out because one of the boys fans tweeted that she along with her sisters were only dating the boys because they are gold-digging whores who are just trying to get recognized for their music. After that I kept saying that I was not dating Niall Horan and that we have just become friends due to the relationships between my cousins and his band members.

Good news is that Niall texted me back, but he has been acting weird through them, well even more weird than he usually is. When we text he usually sends a giant paragraph with a whole bunch of emoticons and exclamation marks, but now it's like one sentence or not even that and no emoticons. It's valentines day today and I was going to Skype with Niall. The girls are in London with the boys, and I would have gone to see Niall but then I remembered that no body knows we are dating (which is partially my fault) so I figured a Skype call would be a close second.

Over the whole month, I realized that what I feel for Niall is actually love, and I was going to tell him today on the Skype call. I'm on my bed right now, waiting for Niall to answer the call. I did not even wait for long before his face popped up, but he was not his happy self. "Hey Nialler, what's wrong?" I asked, "What? Oh nothing, just a little tired at the moment," was his reply, but he sounded a little distant. I bit my lip, contemplating what to say because I'm not used to this Niall, I'm used to my happy- go- lucky Niall.

"If you were tired then we didn't have to do this you know? We could have Skyped tomorrow or something?" I saw him take a deep breath and look at me, "actually I had to tell you something anyways" I wonder if he is going to tell me he loves me too! I hope he does, that would make this like those sappy romantic movies I watched with my mom. "That's awesome, because I have to tell you something too, but you go first!" I only wanted him to go first because I'm actually a little nervous to be saying the L- word again.

"Clary," he started letting out a sigh, looked up at the ceiling before he looked at me again. It looked like tears were building up in his eyes, but it was too dark to tell, "I don't, I-uh," he lets go of a shaky breath, looking even more nervous then I am, "I don't think you and I are going to work out anymore," he says, and just like that my heart shatters. "W-what? But I thought" I was stuttering so much and I hate it so much because it makes me feel weak and I hate feeling weak. "I'm sorry Clary, but I can't be with someone who doesn't want to be seen with me in public," he tells me, and I'm just sitting there with tears falling down my face. The worst part about this is that he can't even look me in the eye when he crushes my heart into a million pieces.

I take in a breath, to at least gather up whatever dignity that I have left and look at him. He is looking straight at me now with a small hint of regret and sorrow, for whatever reason I don't really know but he shouldn't have those emotions right now. "You know the reason why I didn't want people to know Niall, you knew! And really? After what? Three and a half months of dating you think we wont work out anymore?!? Why didn't you tell me this before instead of getting my hopes up about actually being happy again!" Now i'm just rambling but I don't care because I am so angry and hurt that I feel If I let everything out no matter how harsh it is, "Gosh I feel so stupid! I hate myself for giving you a chance when I knew that you stupid celebrities don't care about anybody but yourselves and your reputations! Well you know what Niall? Screw you! I hate you and I never want to hear from you ever again!" 

I saw him flinch and I'm pretty sure let out a few tears before I shut my computer off. I can't believe he just said that, especially when I was going to tell him I love him, and the worst part about all of this is that I still love him and I know that I will still love him for a while. I knew I should not have put my heart on the line like that, because every time I do it always ends with me heart broken. Zander comes running into my room and jumps on my bed, he has the biggest smile on his face but it vanished once he saw my tear stricken face.

"Sissy what's wrong? Why are you crying?" he asks, and for a minute I don't know if I should tell him. He idolizes Niall so much and I don't want to taint his vision of him, but I would rather him know the truth now instead of later on and be in even more pain. "Zander honey, I have some bad news to tell you. Niall won't be coming here anymore," looking at his face now, i regret telling him, he looked so heart broken and he even looked like he was going to cry. "Why? Does he not like me anymore?" a sob breaks out of my mouth remembering my conversation with Niall, "no buddy, no, it's just- Niall doesn't like me anymore and he doesn't want to be with me, so he is not going to come to the house anymore," I reassure him.

He looks in thought for a few minutes before anger takes over is features, "fine, if Niall doesn't like you anymore then I don't like Niall anymore! Zach and I no longer want him as a friend" he said while crossing his arms. I laughed through another sob and hugged him tighter to me, then we got up and walked downstairs to the kitchen for supper and my wet cheeks didn't go unnoticed by everyone. I told them all what happened and they agreed that Niall was no longer allowed into the house.

After supper, I went to give Zander a bath. We played some underwater games he invented and he pretended to be the new Santa Claus. Once he was dried and dressed, I asked Zander if he would like to sleep in my room that night, I was hurting and I didn't want to be alone. I carried him to my bed and we tucked ourselves in, Zander grabbed my hand and whispered, " don't worry Sissy, I will protect you from all the bad guys out there," in my ear. I smiled, kissed his forehead, pulled him closer and fell asleep.

*the next day*

The moment I woke up, I called the girls and told them what happened, and to say that they were shocked and angry would have been an understatement, they were livid. I swear I could have heard Danny say that she was going to hang him from the ceiling by his nuts. Once I reassured them that I am fine (lie) and that they don't have to worry (lie) we settled into a small silence. They said goodbye and that they would see me soon and I went back to sulking. 

I don't know how I am going to survive this, I mean my heart was barely whole going into this relationship and now, I don't even know what it is now, it feels like there is nothing there anymore.

Hopefully I can move on from this.

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Hey, 

I am so sorry for that! It's just I felt like this story was going nowhere so I needed to add more drama. 

Warning: The next few chapters are going to be a little depressing, so If you easily get depressed then I would most probably advise you not to read.

Also like, comment, share, vote whatever I will be happy with whichever lol

lots of love,

-Melanie :)