Learn To Love Again

Chapter 5_Back Home.

Surprise! Early (Earlier Than i stated in my NOTE) update! Pretty please: VOTE, COMMENT AND FAN MEEE. I put a lot of hard work into this chapter and book so i hope you guys like it! Also, this chapter seems really long to me so yay! I just wanted everything to happen so that i can continue in the next chapter which starts in Synane! Next chapter you guys will know WHY Amelia left Synane and what happened.

Enjoy!

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Chapter 5_ Back Home.

The sun is shining through the curtains as i open my eyes, blinking and rubbing them trying to adjust my focus. I sit up and immediately grab my phone to look at the time, 8:00 am it read. I then realize that today is Saturday and i could sleep in a few extra hours. But..the problem is, i can't. I don't know why, i just can't fall back asleep. It's like something's telling me not to go back to bed..

I open my drawer to take out my journal, might as well do some writing, when i notice the plastic sleeve aside. It then dawned on me..It wasn't a dream! Tyler really came here last night and he really bought me a ticket..and...and..i'm really going..I close the drawer taking only my mint green journal out. I'll deal with reality a bit later. Not quite ready to face the day just yet.

My journal is pretty much my safe haven. I've had it since High school and I wouldn't dare part ways with it. It has everything in here, from old poems, favourite book quotes to random quotes and entries like about Ethan and I or about something significant. Ethan was mostly a part of this book. Yes, he read my journal, but only pages that i wanted him to see. After all, i did need my privacy and he respected that, even though he'd always tease me about writing about some other guy besides him in there. I smile.

I open it to a random page and read it. It was my first journal entry since i've moved here..the last one being entered a day or two before i left Synane. And i know why i wrote this. My motivation..

"I fell in love with you. Your danger, your passion, your intensity. Your laugh when you're being happy. Your laugh when you're being a smartass. Your intelligence, your thoughtfullness, your depth. Your curiosity, your stare, your patience. Your dreams, your devotion, your fearlessness. 

..And now, i have to learn to live without you. To let go.."

My motivation to stop me from hurting, but it just only reminded me more of why i fell in love with Ethan Hugh. And right now, the reality of it was that i'd be seeing him. Suddenly a wave of nausea hits me. I'll be seeing him. In the flesh. After 5 years. Well, duh Amelia. You didn't think he'd miss his own brother's wedding, did you? Secretly i was hoping for the impossible right now, but like mum said, it's a good thing. I'm making peace. Gosh, Ethan. I don't blame you if you hate me. It might just make things more easier for me, even though more hurtful. 

Shaking my head and deciding not to take pity on myself I return my journal to it's place. I glance at the ticket in that plastic sleeve and lay back, sighing. Then i rememberd! "Shoot, Hannah!" i say to myself, scrambling for my phone.

Dialing the familiar number, my best friend picks up on the 3rd ring.

"Hello?" she answers, panting.

"H-hey, why are you panting?" i ask, worried.

"M-mia? Oh hey you! No, I was running to get my cellphone. I was downstairs and lucky i heard it too" she says, perking up instantly.

I start laughing, "H-hannah? W-why were you running?Seriously, you sound really funny" she did!

"Oh, yeah, mum's got the florist here and a few of my aunts came down early to uhm..quote, help, unquote"  she says obviously annoyed