I'm Not One of Them

He's a good guy, Wren.

It was the end of the day, and I had spent at least 20 minutes in the washroom, putting on make-up and trying to make myself look, at least, a tad presentable. Vee stormed in with an annoyed look on her face and grabbed my arm to turn me away from the mirror,

“Oh c’mon, Wren. You look perfect, would you stop worrying? Now let’s get a move on, before John pulls a shit fit.”

I rolled my eyes at her words. I never understood how she described John to act that way. He never seemed like the type of guy to get mad at her for the littlest of things. We had become really close friends and he was always so kind and considerate of my feelings. Sometimes I wondered if Vanessa exaggerated half of the time.

Following her lead, we walked at a casual pace, to John’s apartment. I looked around the neighbourhood, and kicked at the lifeless leaves that had fallen to the ground as the new season took its toll. Stopping in my tracks as we reached the apartment building, Vee looked at me with concern filling her beautiful brown orbs,

“Hey, it’s okay. I know this is going to be hard, but I believe in you. It’ll be okay, I promise,” she smiled at me, and squeezed my hand in reassurance as we walked down the hallway to the apartment.

Opening the door, John took Vanessa in his arms giving her a sweet kiss. He looked behind her and noticed the nausea taking over my body, he pulled me in for a hug kissing my forehead, “Don’t worry Wree, he’s a good guy.”

He knew. He knew more than anyone else about how I felt. And he knew what had happened that night. He was the brother I never had and if I didn’t have him, I don’t know if I’d still be alive right now.

See, the thing is, one night I had been out at the club. It had been John, Vee and I. I was getting a little dizzy, so I went out back to get some air. There was a guy in the corning crying with his head in his hands.  So I had walked over to him to make sure he was all right.

We talked for a few minutes and out of nowhere he kissed me. I can’t say I didn’t like the kiss, because I did. But, one thing led to another and he was on top of me trying to rip my clothes off. And that’s what I didn’t like. I whimpered and yelled as he took my innocence, praying to God that somebody would hear me.

A little too late, but still grateful for, John came out and saw what was happening. His eyes filled with rage and it looked like he was going to just about murder the guy. John tore the pig’s body off of mine, as I recall, and brought a few - more like a ton - of massive and powerful punches to his face. And I just sat there as I tried to cover up my body with the little pieces of clothing I had left, feeling disgusting and lifeless.  After that night, John promised he’d do everything in his power to make sure I ended up with the right guy. And I trusted him.

As we pulled away, I noticed the glare that appeared on Vee’s face. Did I do something wrong? Whatever it was, I let it slide. Maybe she was having a bad day.

I threw my body on the comfortable new sofa that John had bought and started reading a book that had been in my bag for at least a month now.

 Trying to ignore the sloppy kisses coming from John and Vee’s mouth, I put my headphones in listening to the only song I ever listened to after that night. I rolled my eyes and flipped the page to my now opened book.

The doorbell buzzed, and my eyes widened in horror as I had a pretty good idea who it was,

“Easy tiger, you’ll be fine,” John reassured me with his sweet blue eyes.

Just breathe, Wree, what the heck is wrong with you? He’s just a guy, not all of them are the same, you know? Breathe. I nodded my head to reassure John I was fine, but I realized I was trying to reassure myself instead.