Never Knew We Needed You

12

"Mark! You ready?"
"Yeah hang on, left my jacket."
Mark comes out to the driveway and greets me with a kiss. I'm busy buckling Copeland into her little infant car seat.
"Hi Copeland!" He says, leaning in to smile at her.
Mark starts the car and we begin the long drive to my brother's house.
"So how you doing?"
I sigh, "Well I've been a lot better. But my mom and dad are really excited to see you and the baby. Combined with them not knowing about the wedding, well, we're bringing a bit of good news."
Mark smiles at me,"Glad you feel that way."

"Aunt Paige! You're here!"
I'm taking Copeland out of the car while a bunch of my nieces and nephews attack me.
"Hey guys! Want to meet your cousin?"
Foster and Vivian, one of Tyler's little girls, both eagerly look at her, and the rest of them shyly crowd around me. Mark comes up from behind them and scoops up Joan and tickles her until she screams with laughter. He plants a light kiss on my head and we move towards the house where Tory greets us.
"Hey you guys! It's good to see you, and my goodness, is this the one and only Copeland?"
My sister-in-law, what a cheerful, gorgeous woman. I hand her Copeland and the three of us head inside with the kids swarming in as well.
Wyatt and Nathan come up and hug me.
"Hey! They're on the back porch, try to stay calm okay?" Nathan says. I nod. Mark gives my hand a reassuring squeeze and stays in the kitchen to talk to my brothers and sisters-in-law.
Tory comes in just before I go outside to hand me Copeland. I look at her tiny face. She wrinkles her brow, matching mine. I let mine relax, and she copies me. She rarely copies faces, even though it's normal for this stage. I purse my lips, and she tries to match it best as possible. I smile at her, and head out to the porch.

"Mom? Dad?"

My dad turns to me, smiling. His blue eyes are sparkling, and it's as if a huge pain has been lifted off of him as I walk closer to him.
"Clara, Paige is here."

I'm not prepared for what I see next.

My mother turns to face me. I'm expecting her warm brown eyes that she's always had, but instead I'm greeted with cold, clouded over eyes that still manage to smile at me, still manage to see my daughter.

"Oh sweetheart, I've missed you so much. Come here, let me see you."
I walk over to her and sit on the bench besides her, between her and my dad.
"Oh Paige, oh oh oh, she's so beautiful, oh I'm so happy, oh darling..." She says. Her voice is low and difficult to make out, so full of love. She can see her, I know that for sure. Still I describe the less important parts
"So far her eyes are similar to Mark's, but we can't tell who's hair she has. She has the tiniest nose and ears, and her fingers and hands are the sweetest things in the world. I can't believe she's mine, I finally understand how you boy feel."
Mom sighs, "Oh baby, what did Renata say? Oh I can't remember exactly, but she's so right. Oh, I feel blessed to have all of this. All these children, oh Paige, I'm just blessed."

I'm desperately trying not to cry. Looking at my gentle, loving mother. The eyes that find the good in everyone and everything have become gray and bloodshot, but they're still my mom's. It's still her. My father, who's protected not only me, but my brother. Protecting our mother in the most dire moment. Sacrificing his arm, sacrificing the hand that I've clung to many times to save her. He can see every detail of his granddaughter, but so can my mother.
"Hey Paige! Where's Mark, you brought the boyfriend, right?" Dad asks.
I blush, "Well, actually, he's not just a boyfriend anymore. Mom, feel my hand."
She of course, immediately grabs my ring finger and gasps with joy.
"You're getting married! Oh baby, where's Mark?"
"Mark! Come in here!"
Mark walks in and my dad stands up. Mark goes to shake his hand, but my dad throws his arm around Mark, a touching gesture. I knew my parents would get around to liking Mark as much as the rest of the family does.

All the kids are swimming in the pool and Copeland is handed to various aunts and uncles along with four other babies. I go into the kitchen with my mother and sisters-in-law while Mark stays with my dad and brothers outside watching the kids.

"So Paige, how's L.A.?" Caroline asks?
"Oh you know, it's good. Ever since Copeland was born, we've been mainly focusing on the wedding, and well, being parents."
Tory laughs, "Oh you haven't seen anything yet. Just wait till she's a few months old. It gets worse, trust me."
"Yeah, but you also get to do more things with the kid, which is really, really fun. Three months is one of my favorite ages, because they can sit up and are much more responsive," Felicia chimes in.
Jessica, who's furiously smashing a pot of sweet potatoes, simply laughs, "How about five or six months? I like that a lot."
Caroline snorts, "Yeah, well I have five boys and Paige Jr. showing up in a month. I'm ready for Ben and Isaac to stop being babies and just turn two already."
Renata and Tory come downstairs and join the battle of what-age-is-the-easiest while I sit at the counter, smirking into a glass of lemonade. I'm used to these conversations, but now that I'm a mother I guess I qualify to join them.
"I like Copeland at this age. She's cute, wakes me up at all hours of the night, and she can barely smile yet, but she's really responsive," I say. Tory smiles at me, "I think that's awesome that you feel like that."
"Yeah, also Mark is a huge help with the baby. In fact, he's usually the one who gets her."
Of course this brings up a round of complaints of how my brothers never help with the babies. I go back to my lemonade and let them debate.

After we eat and all the kids are asleep, Mark and I go to sit on the porch.
"I'm so glad we came back," I murmur. He plays with a strand of my loose hair, and sighs happily.
"Yeah, me too. Your family is hilarious. I could hear your sisters shouting from inside. I don't mind getting Copeland in the night, I'm a dad you know? You carried the thing for nine months and had to be cut up to get her out. Least I can do is give her a bottle at three in the morning."
I giggle, and he puts his arm around my waist.

"I love you Paige."
"I love you too, Mark."