Bella's PoV
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I sat in the passenger seat of Trevor's truck, we sat in silence listening to the radio. The sky was a dark blue colour by this time and you could see the stars. Trevor was concentrating on the road while he weaved in and out between cars at a dangerous speed. I was thinking about all the stories of him and Michael, all their problems and fights. I tried not to think about my problems, like the fact that the last proper conversation I had with agent 14 ended in him saying 'I'm going to make your life hell, I'm going to destroy you and make you live with the same guilt I've lived with for years' and now he's back in my life and still wants to ruin it. Seeing him bought back the feeling of anxiety I haven't felt for years. As a teenager I sometimes got panic attacks and felt anxious a lot of the time. No one ever fully calmed me down, my dad called a couple of times when I had massive attacks that lasted for hours and he calmed me through the phone he was good at it however I never fully calmed down, I was never able to go back to sleep, most of my attacks happened during the night when I was vulnerable to my demons. I thought about how Michael told me about the last time he was in North Yankton, how anxious he felt when him and Trevor were pointing their guns at each other, how he didn't want to kill him but didn't want to die. A question I thought about before came into my head. I finally decided to ask Trevor what I've been wondering for ages.
"So I wanted to ask you something. T." I started.
"I dress to the right." Trevor simply said.
"What?" I asked in confusion not understanding what exactly he was talking about.
"Nothing." He said realising that I wasn't asking whatever he thought I will ask.
"No. I wanted to ask you...why didn't you..." I hesitated. "Why...why didn't you...you know...kill Mikey?" I forced out. Trevor took his eyes off the road for a second and looked at me then back at the road.
"I'd rather talk about my penis."
"What a surprise." I said sarcastically.
"I don't know. I thought a lot about it." Trevor started. "I wanted to. I really did. But... he's got kids and...I don't quite know. I suppose it was a long time ago and I suppose we had some fun here and I suppose I made my mind up - he's a dick. But the people against us were worse so I killed the bigger dicks. And Michael lucked out."
"Well that makes sense." I agreed.
"I mean. He's still a dick, but I kind of love him for it. I love how much he hates himself. It makes me feel all is right with the world."
"Hmm." I felt like I needed to agree with him on this sensitive subject but I didn't want to say anything, so a sound was enough.
"I mean you don't think he's a dick." Trevor pointed out. "But wait till you know him better you'll see him for the true turd he is." Trevor continued. "I mean you should've noticed by now."
"What cha trying to say T?"
"I'm trying to say I know what's going on."
"What's going on." I repeated with confusion.
"Yes. What's going on. I know you're banging Mikey." I didn't know what to reply, he figured it out. But what do I say to keep this a secret I thought.
"What? Eww." I answered.
"Don't try lying to me! I know ok, even if you weren't banging him you still would be thinking about it. I mean from day one you two were all over each other, you come together you exchange smiles through the meeting. We all knew Michael will try to bang you sooner or later. The question is how many times did you bang? Cause at the pool you two looked like you were about to kiss like ten times so how many times?"
"Once." I replied than Trevor shot me a look that said I know you're lying. "Ok, four times, happy now?"
"At least he didn't make you a liar." Trevor simply said and I didn't reply. I felt slightly embarrassed talking about my sex life with Trevor. We carried on driving and I began to drift off into my dreams. I was about half asleep still aware of my surroundings, Trevor parked the car and looked at me.
"We're here sweetheart." He said before realising my eyes were closed. I tried pretending I was asleep because I was too tired to walk. Trevor stepped out the car walked over to my door and opened it, he carried me bridal style up to his locked trailer door.
"Ok stop pretending, I need to unlock the door." Trevor casually said.
"Fine." I replied as I stood on my own two feet. He unlocked the door to his trailer and it wasn't as messy as I expected. I could only see about three open beer bottles lying around it didn't stink that bad or anything. It was obvious that Trevor wasn't there for a long time. I sat down on the couch and waited for Trevor who went to get my bag to come back in.
"You like it?" He asked as he came back in.
"It's ok." I replied.
"Ok? Really? It's better than fuckin' Los Santos."
"That's your opinion." I said not trying to be rude.
"Yeah, yeah although I haven't been here for over a month because of all the stuff in LS."
"Happy to be back." I said yawning.
"Umm..yeah!.. You look tired."
"Just a bit." I lied, the truth was sleep was the thing a most wanted at that moment.
"Let me show you where you'll be sleeping." He said reaching his hand out to me some I take hold of it and he will be able to pull me. I held his hand and he took me to his bedroom. "You'll sleep here on my bed." He simply stated.
"T I don't mind sleeping on the couch you sleep in your own bed."
"Nah, you're the guest plus I'll be close to my booze if I sleep on the couch."
"Ok, thank you." I said giving Trevor a harmless hug. And yawning once again.
"Ok I'm going to the kitchen, d' ya want anythin'"
"Nah I'm fine."
"Cool, I think you should get some sleep."
"I will T don't worry."
"Ok...and later on I'm gonna go out to meet with my buddy Ron so if you need me call me." Trevor said from the doorway.
"Will do." After Trevor left the room I got changed in to my pyjamas and fell asleep just after I heard Trevor leave. I was sleeping peacefully until the nightmares started.
