The Heroes We Weren't

Chapter 14 - Lady Flawless

"You need to wake up." I grabbed onto his shoulder but he once again avoided my touch.

He was still kneeling by the nursing cart, rubbing his neck with his hand whilst shaking his head. The many things he had pushed off the cart laid in chaos by my own knees - left to their unfair justice of a selfish man too caught up by his own pain.

"Hey," I took another determined grip onto his shoulder and then gently placed my hand on his cheek to turn his face towards me, "hey, look at me."

He wasn't looking, his gaze still rested at a stethoscope on the floor, his pupils seeking comfort, not confrontation.

"They crumble." He then mumbled and raised his hand to place it on top of mine. "The grains of sand."

"Look at me." I repeated. "You're becoming delirious."

He once again let out a moan as he pressed his hand against his forehead, one eye tightly shut.

"No, you listen!" He suddenly called out, to no one in particular. "Listen, sand!"

He pointed his finger to the corner of the ceiling.

"I don't have your blood on my hands, he does and he only. And her," his words faded into a whisper as he lowered his hand as well as his gaze to finally look back at me - Glances of mere disgust.

"And her." He continued. "Little grains, your blood is on her hands, not mine. Not mine." He shook his head, gently this time.

Sand. I had referred to my missions as the grains of sand in Mister Johnson's ant farm. Me being the ant, my worst deed the trail. I relaxed my arm but my fingers did not leave his cheek, as his hand was still on top of mine.

There he was, shooting darts to my already alarmed heart; reminding me of my bad deeds and his own innocence. Yet I couldn't blame him for he wasn't himself, wasn't aware and was clearly not in his right senses.

"You have to wake up." I said, ignoring his further monologue. "I'm sorry but, you have to wake up."

I placed my other hand on his other cheek. A tear tumbled down from his eye; boy was lost. Boy had to go back, get a doctor perhaps, because whatever it was that had caused him to act this way, it couldn't be good.

I leant in closer, hoping for my plan to work. Not knowing why or how it could, but following that gut feeling – the one in the midst of the butterfly storm.

His lips trembled as his tear had swirled its way into his mouth. I leant my head to the side, pressed my lips against his, closed my eyes and wished. Ordered, if you will. A silent order for him to wake, for him to leave me behind.

He did not move, did not respond. Fading, he was fading. Waking. He gazed down at his hand, not fascinated by the happening, nor frightened or confused but only accepting of the event.

A lost boy's way home - hallucinations at a halt.

"You go first." I nodded. "I'll be there soon."

It felt like the split second of a blink. He had woken up and I had been left behind in the hospital room of the dream world. Though I was not fully alone, for except from the boy in the bed, the man that Mister Johnson had sent was still unconscious on the floor (how one could even fall unconscious in this world, was beyond me).

I had to hurry, had to find Hope and then go back to the real world to make sure that Hyun-Soo was able to get himself to a hospital; a real one. I stood back up, threw the man on the floor a quick gaze, and hurried out of the room.

In order to wake up I would have to kill the little boy, that was the mission after all, but I would never let such a thing happen. I had to find another way, or just rely on the belief that Hyun-Soo could handle the –whatever that delirious state had been- on his own.