"Nate can you please go and get some more diapers? We are down to our last two." Ryder said bouncing Noah in her arms. She felt like she was about to lose her mind. Another week had passed and all Noah did was cry. She was stressed. She was exhausted.
"More diapers? Didn't we just get some?" He asked. He was so tired of the crying.
"Can you please just go and get them and stop questioning it? We need them! Why do you have to ask so many questions?"
"Jesus okay...I'll go." He grabbed his jacket and his wallet and headed out.
This was far from the life Nate had pictured. His life had been completely changed and he was having a really hard time adjusting. As he made his way to the store his ears felt a moment of peace. Nothing but the sounds of the city. No screaming, crying baby. No voice of his naggy wife. It was a beautiful thing and he found himself casually walking just to enjoy his time away.
After picking up the diapers and the gas drops Ryder had texted and asked him to get as well, he started to head back home. As he passed one of his favorite bars, he could hear live music inside. Suddenly it was Luke he had no control of his legs and he walked into the bar. He grabbed a whiskey and sat at a table right in front of the stage. A local band was playing and they were really killing it. Nate looked around at all the people drinking and laughing, having a good time and enjoying the music. Nate suddenly was overwhelmed with emotions. He missed this. He missed playing live, his energy being fueled by the cheers of the crowd. He missed having drinks with everyone after shows. He missed it all.
About thirty minutes passed before he realized why he had left in the first place. He paid for his drink and headed back home. When he got back the house was quiet. Ryder was sitting in the rocking chair with little Noah asleep on her chest. She looked so tired. When she saw him, she looked at him, annoyed.
"What took you so long? The store isn't that far away?" She said angrily but also softly.
"There was a line at the store. And a new trainee. Didn't know what they were doing. Sorry baby." Nate leaned down and kissed her softly and Ryder thought she could smell alcohol on him. But she didn't want to start a fight. She didn't have the energy for that right now. "How long has he been out?"
"About ten minutes. I gave him a bottle and he passed right out. I think he wore himself out crying so much. I hope he will sleep tonight. I haven't got more than 2 or 3 hours this week. It's really starting to get me down." She said softly.
"Why don't you give him to me and you can go take a nap? You deserve it." He said.
Ryder was surprised. She really wasn't expecting him to step up like that and offer to help out and give her a break. She really needed it.
"Thanks baby. I really could use it." She gently handed Noah to him and kissed his cheek. She walked into the bedroom and laid on the bed, passing out almost instantly.
Nate spent the next hour or so playing video games. He was really into it tonight. So into it, that he didn't even heat Noah crying upstairs.
Ryder woke up to it. She got up, her body feeling like it was being weighed down by bricks. She walked into the nursery and picked him up. She changed his diaper and bounced him. She walked downstairs to where Nate was. She was so mad when she saw him playing his games.
"I don't mean to interrupt your precious video games, but did you not hear your son crying?"
"What? Hold on this game is almost over." He replied, not even hearing what she was saying. Ryder leaned down and unplugged the Xbox. Nate looked up at her, mouth hanging open. "Why did you do that!?"
"Because your son is more important than a stupid video game Nate. God where is your head at right now? Don't offer to keep and eye on him so I can take a nap and then completely ignore his crying! Get your shit together! You're a father now!" Ryder said loudly. She couldn't even stand looking at him right now. She bounced Noah in her arms and walked around the house with him. She was so mad. She was still so tired and she felt like crying. She hated that she felt like she had no help.
"Shit. I'm sorry. I was in another world." He dropped the controller and stood up. "Here let me take Noah. You can go back to sleep."
"No Nate! I'm up now! You should have been watching him earlier! God Nate, he's been here for a month, why is it so hard for you to step up?" She almost started to crying. "I need your help here..." She had to walk away before she broke down. She headed upstairs and took Noah into their bedroom. She laid in bed with him, trying to comfort him.
Nate knew he was really in trouble. He had really messed up this time. He didn't know if he should give her some space or try and talk to her. Even if he went and talked to her, what would he say?
This life was going to be a lot harder than he thought. Was he up for the challenge?
