I know what you did....

Chapter 5

Sophie's head was spinning more and more. Her memories of what happened that day with her ex kept coming and won't stop. She couldn't take it. It wasn't her fault that he made her turn around so fast that the blade of the knife went through his skin, muscles and cut of one of his arteries. It wasn't her fault. Even the police told her it wasn't her fault when they got to the scene. She told them what happened and they believed her. She wasn't accused for anything since she was basically victim of rape and beatings. He used her for his own benefits. He did whatever he wanted with her whenever he wanted, and she could do nothing about it. She just had to take it and find a new excuse for her bruises. She didn't want her family, especially not her brothers to find out. They would kill her for not telling them before. She didn't want to seem powerless. They were overprotective over her all the time and for once she wanted to handle it on herself. She wanted to show them she wasn't the young girl that they needed to protect, but that was before that happened. That she killed him, made her feel powerless over her own body. "STOP!" Sophie yelled out loud. She needed her thoughts to stop and just forget about what happened. She couldn't take it anymore. It was too much. "Sophie!" her brother, Matt, said. She didn't even know that he was there, but she had been gone for some time. Maybe Mike called him to come over. They both used to deal with her nightmares about her, now dead, boyfriend. They even had to do it when he was still alive. She would call one of them at the middle of the night telling about her nightmare, and they would all deal with it. Her nightmares could get very dark. Some times when she called she couldn't even tell them over the phone, because she was so scared it was true. After he died she thought it was because he was haunting her, but then she remembered that she used to have them before he died. She didn't want to go to someone to talk about her problems. No way. She wouldn't talk to some stranger about her killing her first boyfriend because he abused, and raped her.

"Sophie!" He said once more and only then Sophie could focus on him. "Shouldn't you get ready? We are leaving in 30 minutes," Matt said and tried to smile, but Sophie recognized the fake smile. She had done it for years and most of them were to Matt and Mike. She got up from the couch and walked over to her room. She found her gear and packed it in her bag. She changed into her favourite shirt that said Play ball. With the shirt she had some normal black tights. She was going to change into her jersey when she got to the hall. She had her pants and her jersey over there, so she had no other choice then just change later. Sophie pulled the bag onto her shoulder and walked out of her room. "I'm ready to go," she told her brother. He grabbed the car keys and walked out the door. "Don't lock up, Mike is still in there. He's coming over later," Matt said and pressed the elevator to go down. They lived on the 4th floor of the building. They used to live in the 1st floor, but then Sophie started to scream at night and neighbours started complaining about it. Matt found out that 4th floor was isolated and no one could hear anything from the inside of the apartment. He requested the owner if they could move into one of the apartments up in the 4th floor and the owner was so kind to them and let them move there before the nightmare to Sophie was at its worst. This was about a month after the death of the abusive boyfriend. Since then the nightmares seemed to die down, but kicked in again after some weeks of weak nightmares. Then the nightmare could get very bad and even Matt and Mike had no idea how to deal with it. They didn't want to push Sophie to talk to someone about them, but they kept telling her it might help her sleep better. Sophie still refused to go to someone, but after receiving the texts she was considering going to some psychologist. It creeped her out that someone knew so much about her, that she didn't even know who it was. The thought of him made Sophie doubting herself. Maybe she did it on purpose. Maybe she could have avoided killing him. Maybe it didn't have to end like that. Maybe he didn't even deserve to die. He was a nice guy before he started drinking.

While they were in High School, he was the guy every girl wanted, but couldn't have because he was dating her. He was dating one of the biggest nerds in the school. Sophie had her head in the books and was getting straight A's while he was a football player and the most popular guy in school. Still he chose to be seen with her. Out of all the pretty girls at school, she was the one that was lucky enough to call herself his girlfriend. The biggest nerd dating the schools jock. It was like a fairy tale, but in real life. He treated her like a princess and took really good care of her. That was until he was old enough to buy alcohol and started the downhill road to alcoholism. When he started it was harmless, but as time went on, he got violent and demanding when he was drunk. If Sophie didn't do what he told her to, he would hit her or even worse he would get his friends over, and they would torture her until she was bleeding and didn't look like herself. Then they would leave to get even more drunk and not come home before the day after. Sophie would always end up saying sorry to him for what she did, and tell him it won't happen again. It was always the same routine. She did nothing wrong, he got mad, tortured her, got drunk at a bar and she was the one apologizing. It would go on and on and on, but no one knew. Sophie didn't want them to know, nor would anyone believe her. He was so nice to everybody else and it didn't seem they had any problem, but once they were alone all hell broke loose. A couple that everybody in high school wanted to be had turned into something no one would have thought about them. They seemed to be perfect for each other, but that was not the truth. That Sophie had to learn the hard way. By staying with him until she almost got beaten to death several times. Even several times a day, and it could last for days. The bruised stayed with her, some turned into scars, while others disappeared. Still Sophie was defending him, because she thought she loved him. He was her first boyfriend, her first everything. She felt like she couldn't love anyone else ever again. Maybe that was the thing. What if he was her soulmate and she killed him? What would happen to her? Would she be alone forever? Or would she find a new one to love and care for?

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I hope you like this chapter. I'm trying my best to make them different from each other, some of them are short and some longer. But in the future I hope I will be able to write long chapters and that you like them. If you have any ideas for what's going to happen in the next chapter you're free to comment in here, and I'll see if I can put it in the chapter. I love getting feedback on the chapters and I hope you like how I'm writing the story so far. I'm sorry if the last one was a little brutal, but it had to happen. Hope you stay tuned for the next chapter and I'll write it was fast as I can.

~ Maggee