She (#YourStoryIndia)

She

"We cannot all succeed if half of us are held back."

She had always been an ambitious child. No matter what she did, she made it a point to succeed in it. And succeeding to her meant finally getting that education that she had been deprived of for so long.

She'd had one too many arguments and debates with her father on why that education is important for and to her. Most of them ended with her crying and asking him why he discriminated so much between his daughters and sons. And the rest of them ended with her just silently walking away. Which again led to another heated discussion between her father and her mother about how the education is what made her so brave and bold enough to walk away from her parents.

What she realised from these arguments was that her father's stubbornness almost rivalled her ambitious nature. Although she wasn't sure if those were two different yet completely similar things, she knew that if she could do anything for her goal, her father would do anything to stop her from achieving it.

Her siblings, while originally expected to support her and defend her argument full fledged, nodded heads with their father's words and that sealed the case. There were to be no more arguments on the topic at hand. She wasn't getting her education. Instead she was to be thankful that she even got to finish her tenth because according to her parents, some people weren't even lucky enough to receive that.

On one hand, her parents were right, she thought. There's no counting how many people have been kept away from education. She knew several people who didn't even know what the word education meant. But then again in a still developing country like India, it wasn't much of a surprise. People passing only their tenth grade was common. Most of them weren't allowed to continue further and the rest of them didn't want to continue further.

But even if her parents were right about that, she still didn't understand why her brothers got to finish their studies and she didn't? Was it because she was a girl? Was it because she had a different pair of genitals than her brothers did?

This question had been running through her mind all day ever since her latest argument with her father.

She was in the middle of a rant in her head when she felt a gentle tug on her kurti. She looked down to see her mother looking at her with big black eyes and a sad smile on her face.

She sighed. Even when she was sick and bedridden, that smile never seemed to vanish from her mother's face. She kneeled down beside her mother and let her mother stroke her hair.

"Your father loves you, you know that right?" She spoke in a weak voice.

"Yes, mumma. But I don't understand why it's always girls who have to suffer. My brothers are all getting their education so why can't I get it too?"

Her mother choked out a laugh and she was almost worried something was wrong with her but her mother placed a hand on her wrist and slowly brought it to her lips. That little gesture made her forget her about her crisis for a second but even that was short lived. Just like her education, she thought bitterly.

"I love you and I love dad but you need to understand that this education is important for me. I have tried to understand his perspective about this but it is easier said than done, Maa. I hear all my friends talk about how amazing college is. And how exciting the experiments are. I want to do something for myself and for you guys."

"And you will do, my little one. But you're soon going to get married to somebody and I don't know if his family will be for or against it."

She held in the eye roll and sighed. "Let's just say I am going to get married sometime in the next two years but what's his family's approval got to do with anything?"

"It's important, darling. You are not just marrying your husband, you are marrying his whole family too. You will have a responsibility towards them too."

"I don't think I'll be willing to bend my rules for somebody else, mummy."

-

The first time she saw him, it wasn't anything out of the ordinary. She was relaxed, her heart seemed to be beating just fine and there was no romantic music playing in the background. But she was still tempted to take a second glance at him. She never understood why. Maybe it was his baggy clothes or his huge glasses or the novel he held in his hands. All she knew was she wanted to get to know him.

-

Two weeks had gone by since her marriage and she was still yet to hear a polite word from her mother-in-law and father-in-law. She knew love marriages were hard in the society but she never knew the extent of them. Her husband's siblings seemed to be ignoring her presence too. At other times, she would just brush it off but the fact that they were all good friends before the marriage is what sent her over the edge. Every second felt like forever and it felt like the walls were closing in on her. She felt suffocated in this house and dearly missed her own family.

"You are not just marrying your husband, you are marrying his whole family too. You will have a responsibility towards them too."

She remembered her mother's words too well. She never knew how true they were until now. Maybe love did change her. All she knew was that his family was hers now and that was what was reality. Gone were the dreams for the future. Now all that mattered was their happiness. His happiness.

-

She was trying to quieten her crying daughter when she heard the phone ring. She gently placed her baby on the bed and built up walls made out of pillows around her so she wouldn't fall off the bed and went to pick up her phone.

"Hi, I'm so sorry but I'm not going to come home tonight. The other anaesthetist has taken a leave and I have to fill in for him."

She took a deep breath and spoke quietly into the receiver. "It's alright. You take care of yourself and don't forget to eat dinner. I love you."

"I love you too."

With that, her husband hung up on her and she was once again left alone to her thoughts. She was used to this happening so it wasn't a complete surprise. But she was getting tired of him always being away. They had a baby now, they needed to take care of her together. Didn't he promise to always be there for her? But then again she never complained to him about it because he worked hard for them. He worked hard to keep a roof on their head and even if she hated to admit it, she was helpless and she just had to accept the situation as it was. All that mattered was that he still loved her very much and it was enough to keep her going.

-

Hi, I'm probably late for this but I just had to post it. I don't really mind if I am not eligible to take part in the #YourStoryIndia contest now but I wanted to write this from the perspective of somebody who means a lot to me and I just wanted to show the world how many sacrifices an Indian woman makes for her family and her husband's family. I'm glad that such cases are mostly not seen nowadays and girls are getting to live their lives without having to make sacrifices in the name of their families. This is in honour of the many women/men who were made to leave behind their dreams because of the society or/and their families. I respect you.