Princess Of Darkness (Editing)

Ten: Violence (Edited)

Everything I knew about the world, everything I knew about myself, was a product of my existence, my experiences from the last two years.  Who I was, where I came from, I was always left to wonder.  For two years I had existed, two, short years to make up an entire lifetime.  I knew there had to be something before all this, but what? 

Brett held the key to my existence, or, at least he held some of the answers.  To find out that he'd been holding back on me frustrated me to no end, but, I could hardly warrant the feeling of betrayal. 

All I'd wanted was an identity as solid and reliable as the earth I stood on, even just a brief glimpse into my past to find out who I really was.  It was something I wanted so desperately, something he could have so easily given me, but instead, he'd beaten me down and left me broken beyond the point of recognition.  Even if I did know the girl I once was, I doubted if I'd be able to recognise her anymore.

"I want to see him!" I repeated, marching down the hallway. I'd stormed out of the bathroom, past Lucian, to get some answers of my own.  Words had come rushing from me in a torrent of curses.  They didn't necessarily make any sense, but it was as though it was the only thing that seemed to be stopping the fury from completely consuming me.

I desperately needed to know what he knew about where I was from, who I was.  The answers to the questions I'd been asking were mine and mine alone.  I deserved them, I was owed them.  He owed them to me.  And I was going to get those answeres, even if I had to follow Lucian's example and beat them out of him myself.  He knew about me before I ever knew him.  He had to know something.

In the few days I'd been here, I'd become increasingly familiar with this part of the castle, finding each of it's twists and turns unique after all.  But, apparently, blinded by my fit of rage, I wasn't above making a wrong turn or two, and I hesitated at the beginning of an unfamiliar hallway.

"I want to know what's going on," I snapped, my voice coming out sharper than I'd intended, echoing down the hallway. 

I swung back around to Lucian who was following at a safe distance, a few paces behind me as I raged, waiting for my anger to fizz out and leave me thinking and behaving like a rational human being once more.

But I was far beyond the point of behaving rationally.

"Where am I?" I demanded, finally admitting to myself, and to Lucian, that I had succeeded in losing my way.  I doubted if I could even backtrack and find my room on my own, I'd paid no attention whatsoever to where I was going.

Lucian was trying his hardest not to laugh at my predicament, biting back his smile as best he could.  He was kind enough, at least, not to point out my mistake in letting my anger and my tantrum devour me and blind me, but I could see the glint of humor in his ruby like eyes.

I turned the full force of my rage on him, as it continued bubbling underneath the surface of my skin, and I glared at him.

"Calm down," Lucian said, his deep voice soft and calm, soothing me, breaking through the anger like a crashing wave.  He took my hand in his and led me back a little way. "If you want to see him, then I'll take you to the dungeon. But you're not going alone."

I stomped along beside Lucian, feeling the cool calm of his presence slowly quelling the rage that burned like wild fire through my veins. I knew he was agitated by my outburst, unsure of how to approach me, but I was not about to rein myself in.

I needed this anger to drive me and push me to find the courage to face Brett. If I let the wave of calm drown the fire burning within me, then I'd never get the answers I wanted, needed. I'd shrink into myself again, too afraid to even look at him, much less confront him. He had a way of doing that to me.