Twilight Parody

Three

I heeded Edward's advice and went down to the beach with Mike and the other 'guy's'. A campfire was set up, and sure enough, some people who lived on the reservation came onto the beach.

Tall, fit, dark-haired, tanned boys.

Whoa.

I immediately blushed, until one of them put their hand on my shoulder.

Ah, Jacob Black.

"Remember me?"
"How can I forget, Jacob, you used to be so tiny-" He cut me off.
"Okay, we don't need any of the 'let's talk about me when I'm little', I'm basically the same age"
"No you aren't"
"Yes I am"
"Not"
"Am"
"Not" I decided to shake things up, tricking him into saying, 'am not'. "Am"
"Not"
"Ha! You just admitted it!" I started doing a victory dance.
"Are you going to continue to flirt with me so I tell you the cold one story?"
"YEAH!" I shouted and stood up.

He told me the story of the cold ones...and was it the warm ones? Well, anyway, who cares about the 'warm ones', I just care about the cold ones, as for some reason, I prefer this pale, lankey, thin, ginger guy instead of this amazingly attractive, muscly, tanned boy.
(A/N, yes, I am not on any specific team. I think they are both dazzlingly attractive- R-Patz and Taylor Lautner)

I got home and slipped onto my computer. I typed 'cold one legends' and see some legend for the 'animal-blood drinkers'.

Horiffic realisation moment.

Edward's Point of View.

I love watching her from her room. It's like watching a little rabbit trapped in a cage. 'Ah, no, what shall I do?' now, I realised what she was panicking about.

She'd finally realised I was a blood drinking monster of a human-thing with no soul.

I slipped into her room by opening the window.

"Hey, have I scared you yet?" I asked, breathing on her neck, and wrapping my arms around her waist. Her heartbeat went crazy.

"No" She told me.
"Fine then, spidermonkey"
"Really, a spidermonkey analysation!"
"Go with it"

I swung her onto my back and jumped into the nearby tree.

Bella's point of view.

This is a dream.

It has to be.

"Edward, give up on it, are you going to drink my blood or try and scare me"



He dropped me from the top of the tree.

I didn't even scream, it was a dream.

He jumped onto the floor that I was going to land on, and he caught me.

"Coooool. Are we gonna make out?" I asked, because this was a dream. I can kiss any 'blood drinker' I want!
"Er...you just read about vampires. Am I going to kiss the girl with the sweetest blood in the world?"
"Yeah, 'cause then this wouldn't be a story, would it?"
He kissed me there.

This obviously wasn't a dream, as I could feel pain.

He backed away after squeezing my arm.

"I thought this was a dream! Oh, gosh, I'm sorry to be so forward" I blushed and shook my head.
"Please, please don't blush" he begged.

I ran back home.