Aura

Thirty- One

I was sitting in lunch with Ryanna and all everyone was talking about all day was how awesome Angelica's older sister's birthday party was. It was a hotel party and I guess everyone who was anyone in Brooklyn was there. I couldn't care less about her or her stupid party honestly. 

Yeah, Angelica was beautiful and she knew how to dress. But in all honesty, she was a spiteful little bitch. It was clear that she was jealous of me or didn't like me for whatever reason but I didn't really care because I was going to be good regardless. 

Angelica and her friends started to walk past us in unison like they usually did, acting as if they owned the place. Ryanna and I paid them no mind as we continued to talk about what we did over New Year's and she told me about how her and Johnny had really been hitting it off. 

"Oh em gee... Laylani I saw your boyfriends video towards you. You two are so cute," One of her minions said and I could tell it was genuine. For the most part Angelica's friends weren't that bad but monkey say monkey do so... 

"Thanks." I smiled warmly at her and Angelica started to chuckle. 

"I'm sorry, I must have missed the joke?" Ryanna asked feeling heated. 

"I just find it funny... niggas really ain't shit." She started to laugh a little more and set both her hands on the end of the table. 

"What's that supposed to mean?" I asked feeling anxious. 

"Ha... nothing.." She began to walk away and I felt an urge to continue the conversation. Before I could even say anything I heard her mumbling something under her breath. 

"Love your girlfriend today... wasn't saying that yesterday though..." I heard her whisper discretely under her breath to her friend and instantly my blood began to boil. 

"Something to say?" I roared as I jumped up from my seat. 

"Ask your boyfriend sweetie." Angelica said flashing me a unapologetic smile. 

"I'm asking you bitch. You tough right?" I was now in her face and I could feel my character completely break as I stood face to face with her. 

"Who you really talking to?" She asked as she tried to remain unbothered and glared back into my eyes. She must have felt like I wasn't about it because she surely didn't approach Ryanna in the same way. 

"The only bitch I'm looking at!" I could feel my voice level rise and several heads all over the cafeteria looked at the altercation. 

" You really want to know? Me and your boyfriend? The one who loves you oh so much, and I? HAD SEX over break. And it's funny because he didn't mention--" I didn't even give her a chance to finish as my fist instantly connected with her jaw causing her to fall back a little from the momentum. I didn't give up that easily as I was hot and my mind blacked out. I just kept punching her and when she fell below me I got on top of her and continued to work. I felt Ryanna beside me and figured she was going to attempt to peel me off of her. Instead, she started hitting Angelica with me. Angelica fought back weakly as we punched her in her face and attempted to kick her as we were eventually pulled off by multiple teachers and other various girls. 

I was silent as hands grabbed me off and took me out of the lunchroom aggressively. I had a million things going on in my mind and all I wanted to do was fight this bitch again and again and again because all the anger I had built up inside me didn't feel even a little released by the few hits and kicks I had. 

I was separated from Ryanna and Angelica as we all awaited our parent's arrival. I had no idea what was going to happen but as I sat in the secluded room alone I couldn't help but cry. I just cried and cried and couldn't stop the tears from coming out. 

Everything was to good to be true. I just kept thinking to myself how could I let myself be so dumb? During me and Prince's break up all I did was sit there and cry and sulk over his dumb ass and what was he out doing? Fucking other people? I looked down at my finger at this stupid ass promised ring and ripped it off.  

Was this love? How could you claim you love somebody but continue to hurt them. If you truly love somebody you wouldn't do anything to jeopardize that. It just made me think how much did I really know? If Prince fucked a girl from my school when we just happened to be broken up for a few weeks, who else did he fuck? Was he doing that kind of stuff when we were together? 

This was truly the last straw. I couldn't even look at him.If rolls were reversed, and I fucked somebody else, I know he would want nothing to do with me. I don't want to hear any opinions or justifications, that we were "broken up" because regardless, if you have someone you truly care about all you need to do is work to get them back. But instead you having sex with other females? 

"Ms. Davis, your father is waiting for you in the Head Mistresses' office the blonde secretary who I had met on the first day said opening the door. Pity filled her face as she saw my swolen eyes not from the fight but from crying. 

I sat down in the Principle's office and listened to her talk to my father half hearing her. I basically nodded my head and zoned out still thinking about how fucked up this whole situation was. If this was what love was? I wanted no parts. Sitting over here crying over someone who was fucking the next chick was just not acceptable anymore. 

"...expulsion." The words immediately knocked me out of my trans as they came out of the head misstresses , Ms. Opal's mouth? 

"I'm expelled?" I asked tripping on my words. 

"We have a 0 tolerance for fighting Ms. Davis." She responded. My heart started to beat outside of my heart and I instantly regretted beating Angelica up. How could I be so stupid? Now I was expelled and it's all because I don't know how to control my fucking emotions over a stupid boy. 

After a few more exchanged words about next steps, we left the school and my dad lectured me in the car about how he think's "my mothers death is causing me to lash out in unexplainable ways that are going to effect my future in drastic ways." I didn't even respond or acknowledge his words and eventually I zoned out my mind to deep with thoughts. 

As soon as I got home my phone started to ring and Prince's name popped up. My father had taken my car keys and told that I was grounded. I didn't want to answer but it was like I had so much to say that just couldn't wait. I ignored the call and waited until everyone in the house was asleep. 

I quickly got my bag and headed to the train station. It was almost 11 o'clock and I couldn't even think straight. I bought a metro card and headed on the train as I sat in silence trying to sort out my thoughts. I wanted to kill him. Literally, I felt a hate towards him that I couldn't describe that was magnified by the love I felt in my heart for him. 

I sat outside his apartment door and rang it multiple times until he opened it reluctantly with a confused look on his face that turned to worry as he examined my facial expression. 

"YOU PIECE OF SHIT!" I threw my first towards his face as soon as I saw him and his head jolted back immediately at the intensity of his punch. I walked in after him continuing to throw punches as tears leaked out of my eyes and curse words flowed out of my mouth until eventually he grabbed hold of me from the back not allowing me to hit him anymore. 

"LET GO OF ME I FUCKING HATE YOU!"