Torn.

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Nothing's fine I'm torn. 

The song that made all of this happen. The song that was the start of beautiful friendships, and one romance. My daughter was here with me today, and she played the song, and the video.

"Daddy! It's uncle Louis and Liam and Niall and Zayn.. and there's you!" She said pointing at the screen. "Darcy, we've already watched the video 4 times, can we please do something else love?" Harry said chuckling at his daughter's amusement over the old videos. "I wanna draw." She said smiling up at him. "Sure, do you wanna draw with paint or crayons?" Harry asked amused knowing the answer would always be. "Crayons."  Darcy chose crayons of the color brown, green, blue and black.

"You're a little late, and I'm already torn, theres nothings left, I used to cry my insparation has run dry. And that whats going on." Darcy sang as she drew. Harry smiled lovingly at his daughter. She was beautiful, she had dimples like him, curly brown hair and blue eyes. When she was done she held up the picture, and it confused Harry. "It's me, you and Louis!" She said smiling. In the picture Harry and Louis were holding hands, hearts were popping around them and Harry was holding Darcy's hands as she stood next to him, the scenery was a sun in the corner and a tree in the background, as if they were at the park. Darcy was 11 years old. She would figue it out, sooner or later. "Wh-y did you um, dr-a-aw this?" Harry asked stunned. "I've noticed." Darcy said looking at him seriously. "What do you mean?" Harry said. "You know exactly what I mean. I've noticed, how you look at him whenever you get the chance. Even when we were watching the video your eyes were locked on him." Darcy said looking up at him. "Wha-t? No, Dar-" "You love him." Darcy said looking up at him. "That's why your relationship with mum never worked." Darcy said staring at him. Silence. *Ding dong.* "I'm going to go get the doorbell." Harry said quietly. He answered the door to see Niall, his daughter and son. "Hi Harry!" Niall said hugging him. "Hi, Niall." Harry laughed. Niall and Harry kept in touch the most than the other boys, so they always had a special bond. "I hope you don't mind if I leave these 2 here for some hous, wife and I are um... doing some thing later on and we can't have these here to witness it." Niall winked as Harry laughed. "Sure, just in a nice time, Darcy's here too." Harry said as Darcy was just walking down the stairs and ran to hug Niall. "I see she missed me." Niall laughed. Darcy was much older than Niall's children. "Well, alright have fun." Harry winked as Niall laughed saying "Goodbye mate."

"Alright, well you all have my house to yourselfs so, go have fun. And Darcy, we'll talk about it later." Harry said. "If you're hungry, just ask one of the maids, if you need to have fun, just go to the game room, and yeah." Harry said walking up stairs to write in his diary again.

She figured it out.

How? Was it that obvious I had and still have feelings for him? "You love him." No- I don't.

Maybe, a little but..

I can't have her knowing this. She was supposed to know when she was older, that way we could actually talk about this. But at 11 years old? She's going to think I left her mother because I couldn't control my emotions for Louis. Well, that was part of the situation.. but, I never loved her mother. I never did, she was a beard in 2015 when everybody was getting even more suspicious, our fandom was 80% larry shippers and 20% Elounor. It was getting to the point they found everything about us, hidden audio of us talking, even a hiden audio I whispered: "Louis.. Louis boyfriend." When the interviewer asked: "How many of you got girlfriends, or boyfriends?" 

So they got me a beard. Her name was Misty. She was pretty, she was a model and had brown hair with blue eyes, she looked like Louis. Sort of. But they could never make me love her. Even if my life depended on it.

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