Depression At It's Finest.

New lies.

Indiana, I hate the weather here. It's like mother nature is bipolar. One minute I'm freezing in a hoodie and the next I'm suffocating from the heat. It rained today so it's dark. I like it though. I've lived here my whole life in at least 10 different houses. Were always moving to find somewhere cheaper. I figured I'd go hang with Damon and his friends today. I never could get along with the other girl's, they're either to preppy or to ghetto. I miss Damon, it's been a week or so since I've seen him and I'm just afraid that he'll find someone better.
The bell rings for the end of last period and I grab my things and head out. Just before I can make it out of the door Mrs. Sharp stops me.
" You looked a little distracted today are you okay Ireanna?", she asks in her normal suspicious tone.
"Yes I'm fine.", I lie.
I was actually thinking about how I haven't see dad in a long time, I love him deeply but a part of me is telling me that he'll never man up, that he'll never be a father and give me and my brother the attention we so direly need. I just kept my mouth shut and tell the lie that I've been telling an awful lot these days.
"I'm okay."
"Here's tonights homework, its do tomorrow.".
My heart drops, damn I haven't been paying attention to the lesson today, to busy in my thoughts, what do I do? When I finally get off the half hour bus ride I'm greeted by a golden brown pair of eyes and a kiss.
"Hey beautiful!".
Damon's words fill my cheeks with a red glow.
"How's my girl?", he asks.
Once again I say the famous lie,
"I'm okay.", But he knows me far to well and asks what's wrong.
"I just have a lot on my mind."
He gets closer,
"We can talk about it if you want.". "No, that will just get me thinking again."
He says okay and grabs my hand and we walk towards my house. We walk in and I tell him to wait on the couch while I change out of my school clothes. I quickly slip into my favorite pair of skin tight black jeans and a black t-shirt. I then fix my make up and let my hair down. There's a knock on my door and Damon's voice comes from the other side,
"Are you dressed?".
"Yah come in.", I answer back. He looks me up and down,
"you look nice.". I blush and reply, "thanks.".
"What are we doing today?".
" We're going on an adventure", he says.
"An adventure?".
What is he talking about? Then, like he can read my mind he says,
" I thought me and you could go down town and hang out just me and you, we could go to the mall or circle centre maybe the canal.".
My thoughts shutter at the thought of circle centre, it reminds me of a time when my family was whole. No step dad or step brothers. Just me, my brother Trevor, and my parents. We were all there, it was around Christmas and mom wanted to go on a family outing to the circle. My parents where so happy and the hole in my heart didn't exist yet. I shook the memory from my mind and answered,
" That sounds like fun!".