Out Of The Shadows (Lesbian fiction) (Edited version published on amazon)

Part 20

Lacey's POV

"So what did you want?" I asked Jackie rather harshly as we stood outside the door.

"Can we go for a walk?" she asked I looked back at the door remembering what Amelia said to me. 'Go on babe, Talk to her it's the only way to put this behind you, I'll be here for you when you get back, ' I nodded and followed her to the elevator neither of us speaking she lead me out taking a left and headed towards a little park across the street taking a seat at the first bench we came to.

We both sat in silence, I watched Jackie as she sat, her once confident demeanor absent as she gazed at her hands in her lap. She broke the silence without glancing to me. "I want to apologize, Her voice broke, "I had no idea you thought I was... Lauren said you blamed yourself," she paused, "Lace, I never would have stopped your mother from telling you if I knew," she finally lifted her head as her tears slowly fell.

I didn't know how to respond. I should be angry at her but I wasn't, I was never angry at her. Hurt maybe, defiantly lost and confused but I don't think I was ever angry. The night, after all, was my fault.

"Why?" was the only thing I could think to ask. 'Why didn't you talk to me instead of letting me think what I did and letting me run off.?"

"Would you have left and joined the Military if I did? would you have left once you found out I got pregnant?" she asked quietly. "Did you know that... That night I was going to break up with you?" she angrily laughed. "Maybe if I'd done it sooner only one of us would have been hurt that night."

I looked over at her confused. "Why?" I asked again.

"why was I going to break up with you?' I nodded. "Because Lace, You needed to learn to take care of yourself instead of depending on me. you were following my dreams, not yours." She sighed "I know you blamed yourself, But I blamed myself too, I shouldn't have waited, You shouldn't have been there with me that night because of me you were hurt." she said sounding regretful.

"What are you talking about, how can you blame yourself I gave you that damn pill, I did this, they got to you because of me. I'd let them beat me a million times over if I could have stopped them!" I yelled and started pacing in an attempt to calm down. How could she be blaming herself for what I did.

Jackie stood and placed her arm on my shoulder to stop me, "What are you talking about?" she looked at me. Her eyes grew wide after a moment. "Y-you, You thought I took that pill you gave me? Oh my god Lace, you've blamed yourself all this time because you thought you drugged me?" I looked at her confused more than ever as Jackie now started to pace.

"Seven years" she whispered "Seven fucking years." She dropped to her knees and started to cry. 'I'm so sorry, I didn't know a-all I wanted w-was for you to leave, to live your own life." She said between sobs. I didn't understand, the only thing I could think to do was kneel down beside her and take her in my arms. She buried her face into my chest as she pulled me close while she repeated 'I'm sorry' over and over again and she cried.

"I don't understand." I confessed.

She looked up at me her face streaked with tears her eyes held grief-stricken look I've never seen on her face in all the time I've known her. "Lace, I never took that pill." she stated. "I don't know how I ended up being drugged but it wasn't your fault. I'm such an ass if I'd have just talked to you and done this right..." she sighed.

I let myself fall back into a sitting position and just sat there, she loosed her grip on me as I still continued to hold her. I was at a loss for words, where do you go from there? What do you feel? We sat in silence for how long I didn't even know. I couldn't concentrate on one single emotion my mind felt scattered for the first time in a long time. "I need to go and pick up my daughter," She said pulling me back into reality. "Can we talk again?" I nodded still unable to speak she quickly hugged me and stood. "See you later Lace." She said as she walked away.

"Baby?" an angelic voice called before soft hands wrapped their arms around me. her vanilla scent drew me in as I closed my eyes and leaned my head into her as she knelt beside me. "Come inside and take a shower." you've been out here for a couple of hours. I opened my eyes and took in my surroundings noticing the sun had moved further toward the west. I took her hand as she helped me stand and headed back to the room without letting it go. Amelia being the kind soul that I've learned to love asked no questions on your way back.

She started the bath as I sat at the kitchen counter and thought back on the conversation with Jackie. Was I supposed to be angry? Relieved? I still didn't know, maybe I just needed to let it all go. I looked over towards the hallway as I watched Amelia approach. I pulled her into me once she was within reach burying my head into her neck breathing in her scent. "Have I ever told you, I love the way you smell." I mumbled into her neck causing her to giggle.

I pulled back and looked into the most breathtaking emerald eyes I have ever seen on anyone. She stared back into my blue ones and smiled. "What are you thinking?"

"I could get lost in your eyes forever," I said without thinking.

"As I could in yours." She countered I smiled and picked her up causing her to squeal as she gripped onto me as I ran toward the bathroom I undressed and then helped alleviate her of hers before sweeping her back up in my arms before entering the tub. "I could get used to this she smiled as we sat with her front of me. My arm quickly wrapping their way around her pulling her close.

"I love you." I whispered into her ear.

"I Love you too baby," she answered turning towards me allowing me to lean in gently capturing her soft lips with mine. A knock pulled us apart just as things were heating up as Lauren burst through the door with Morgan attempting to follow.

"No way De Luca's," get out she ordered the Marine. "They're naked in here."

"Why do you get to in." she demanded.

"Because I've seen both of then naked before." She smirked. "And I'm sure Lacey would prefer you not see her woman naked." She said trying to push Morgan back.

"I would prefer neither of you sees us naked, so get out" I shot back at my sister.

"But," she started.

I shook my head. "Out!" I watched her pout as Morgan laughed pulling my sister out with her. I pulled Amelia back against we as I leaned back. "we'll never have a moment's peace with either of them around." I huffed as Amelia giggled.

Amelia and I dressed and headed to the living room where the TV was on. "So what was so important?" I asked my sister taking a seat across from her. "I just wanted to see how the talk went with Jackie." She said drawing everyone's attention to me.

"It was ok," I said getting up and heading to the kitchen not wanting to get into details because I still didn't know how I was feeling.

"Fine, I heard her mumble as Amelia leaned in and whisper something to her. "Mom wants us to come over tonight for dinner." Lauren said. 'actually that would be," she looked at her watch "in an hour so get dressed." I just nodded as she and Morgan left I guessed to their room to dress.

A/N: Thought I would stop here, I think that should be enough stress for Lacey for a moment.

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