Dark Roses

Before the bell

Raiden pulled the car up to the drop off and I grabbed my bag and checked to make sure my shoes where tied. I reached to open the door when Raidey started talking. "Hey, stay safe. Be careful, and try and have a good day. Call me if you need anything. Love ya." "Love you too. Bye." I responded with a touched smile on my face. I know almost everybody would be like ugh I hate it when my parents get all 'lovey-dovey' with me. But for someone like me, with what I go through, it;s the best thing you could ever hear in your life. I opened the door, took a deep breath, and prepared myself for another day of hell. Hopefully high school will be better though. Wow. Here I am, First day of high school. This is going to suck. Big time. I made my way into the school where a peppy girl greeted me with a scarily big smile on her face. "Hi! I am the president of student counsel, and I personally would like to invite YOU to help me with service hours this Saturday by helping abused children find a nice, warm, and snugly home!" I froze, my heart sank to the bottom of my Converse. My head was swirling with the awful memories of what they do to me. I started to cry, which was as embarrassing as hell, and pushed that weird girl away and ran to our 9th grade hangout they showed us on our tour in 8th grade. I went to find the furthest corner from people I could find.

I settled down in the corner and put my leather jacket from my bag on. In shame I pulled to hood over my head. Tears of salt rolled down my eyes and into my mouth. Reaching into my bag I pulled out my journal and pen. Stop it Aerith! Write! Write! It's okay! It will all be okay if you write! I scribbled down some things that I hoped would help the pain go away. This is why I can't go to school. My parents gave me PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder). Nobody knows about this except my boyfriend, Griffin. I don't know who to tell and who to trust. I am thinking about telling Raidey after school while my parent aren't home. Anything or anyone can trigger my flashbacks and nightmares. I only let Raiden touch me because I know he won't hurt me and I've known him longer than anyone else. Although I have been gaining more and more trust from Griffin. after thinking some more, scribbling some more, and day dreaming some more I finally finished something. I don't know what it is, but it can only help.

You say it's not real

It's all in my head,

So try for one day

Walk in my shoes.

Dear reflection

What shall I see today,

Will you smile back at me

Or be in disarray.

Will the colors be bright

Will they shine right back,

Or be flat and muted

In all gray and black.

"Hey loser!" I heard a girl laugh from above me. I looked up and there she was. I proudly present the devil, the blackness of my school life, the worst, The Casey. "What do you want Casey" I mumbled to her, not making eye contact. "Ooh whats this," She asked mockingly. "Ha. This dweeb has a little journal," She said to her posse. "How cute." She said in a baby voice. Casey and her "friends" started to go through it. I didn't know whether to stand up to her or go on with my own business. But this is my journal were talking about! Hell, I'm standing up to her! I got up and as loud as I could, I objected. "Hey! That is mine so give it back!" Casey and her posse turned around and gave me a death stare with her eyes of daggers. "Oh so that's how you wanna do it!" I felt grave fear inside and my eyes flashed from when my parents hurt then flashed quickly back to real life. I just don't understand how that is happening! What is happening! I thought. Casey threw the book at me with all her force and hit me in the gut. She knocked the wind out of me. In pain I fell to my knees and groaned in serious pain. "Oops." Her friends formed a circle around her and they started to walk away. When I thought it was all over Casey came back over and punched me in the face. Then they left for good. I think. I felt blood pour out of my mouth and onto my jeans. In agony I tried to get up but failed to even kneel. Everyone was staring at me, but why didnt they do anthing! I started to cry and my PTSD kicked me in the ass. I layed on the ground and I screamed like I was getting murdered. Please! Someone! Please! Help me! Everyone stared more then went off doing their own thing again. HELP!