Cuffed by Will

XXXI. Doubts

Wednesday, 30th May. Day 30.

Holy shit!

Today was the last day!

The last day of being cuffed.

How did thirty days pass by so fast?

I stared at the ceiling and chewed on my lower lip like it was a tough piece of meat. I should be dancing on the clouds right now but I just felt down instead. I felt silly because I had no right to be sad. I should be happy I was getting my independence back. No longer being cuffed to Ezra or follow him everywhere or try to sort our days. No timeouts and a complete 24 hours of freedom to do anything I wanted! Then why the hell was I so sad?

I huffed and turned to my right to face Ezra who was still soundly asleep. No more embarrassing runs in the washroom or having to change in front of someone of the opposite sex. But then again, I was going to get married to this guy and every married couple was comfortable with each other, right? Marriage. Oh God. Brief images of yesterday flew through my mind. Ezra really did expect an actual marriage. And the rich get whatever they wanted with the money they had. Just like how Ezra and I planned our entire wedding in one day. I involuntarily smiled at how distressed that poor wedding planner was. God knew what she thought. Must have entertained the idea of a crazy in love young couple desperate to get hitched the right way.

My smile fell. Crazy in love? More like the complete opposite. Go out with Lucy tomorrow - uncuffed - and get my wedding dress. Then on the 1st of June, I shall be Mrs. Ezra Copper. Fuck. How did the time go by? Ezra hasn't even said the three magic words back to me and we are getting married the day after. It was like we had this whole thing backwards. I sighed and looked at Ezra's sleeping form. I'd kill to know what goes through his mind. No, I'd kill Jeremiah first so I'd never have to kill anyone to know what Ezra was thinking in the first place. Damn Jeremiah, you fucked your brother up pretty bad.

Ezra's rousing form snapped me out of my thoughts and I watched as he woke up. "Good morning," I said softly and he blinked a couple of times before focusing his attention on me. A smile lit his face up and it brought a sense of happiness in me.

"Good morning, Kostelijk. " He wrapped an arm around my waist and pulled me into his chest before burying his face in my hair. Holy hell, who was this guy?

"Someone's peppy this fine morning." I sais in a cheeky tone and took comfort in his arms.

"I love waking up to you in the morning." My heart almost stopped at his words. Sweet, sweet, hell. Did I just dream that or did he really say it? "Ik hou van jou, Liefje. "

"Totally understood that," I muttered dryly and nuzzled into him even more, not wanting an inch of space between us. "Speaking of Dutch, when am I going to know what you say?"

"After you become Mrs. Copper." Ezra's muffled voice came out and then he peppered kisses on my cheek.

"Why then?" I asked softly and sighed. It finally felt like we were going somewhere.

"Because," he said and pulled back to hover above me. "Then I'll be sure you aren't planning to run for the hills."

"Locking me down, aye?" I tried in a fun tone, but neither of us could deny the seriousness behind it. I locked my fingers behind his neck and brought his face down closer to me. "I love you, Ezra, and I'm not going anywhere." I knew I wouldn't but I didn't entertain the possibility of him pushing me away and ending our relationship. Although, do we even have one?

"What do you want to do today?" He asked and I was relieved for the change in topic.

"I don't know. What do you think we should do?"