Iwaoi | Damaged

Chapter four: "Afraid" - Oikawa - Video ©: Nagineko

There was a knock at the door. It was light, and Oikawa could barely hear it. He sleepily got up from the bed and walked to the door. Iwaizumi had gone off to work. Could it be him? Oikawa rubbed his eyes and creaked the door open. There stood a woman around twenty at the most. Freckles that highlighted her energetic hazel eyes. Her bleached blond hair in a bun. Wearing joggers and a sweatshirt.

She's pretty.

"Hello, is Iwaizumi here?" She shoved her hands in the pockets of her pants and rocked back and forth in her heels. Oikawa raised an eyebrow and rubbed the back of his head. "Sorry, he's not here right now. But I could relay the message to him." He leaned against the doorframe and propped his hand on his hip.

"Really, thank you! Tell him Sado just wanted to know when he's coming back to classes. We have a project I'd like to start on as soon as possible." She was bubbly. Oikawa squinted his eyes and dropped his hand. "Sure thing." A pseudo smiled creased his lips. "Thank you again." She waved and skipped off towards the dorm exit.

    He slowly closed the door and sat down on the floor. He didn't want to think anything of it. He tried his best not to think anything about it. He brought his knees to his chest and bit the bottom of his lip.

    He stayed there for hours on end. Until Iwaizumi came.
Everything was empty, with the exception of Oikawa's mind.
She seemed nice, he shouldn't be jealous. After all he had Iwaizumi's heart. He sighed and rose up to walk to the couch.

    Iwaizumi crept into the loft. Noticing Oikawa asleep when he opened the door. He threw down his coat and walked over to Oikawa.

He smoothed his thumb across his bottom lip. At this he awoke. "Hey." He smiled gingerly. Oikawa brought the pillow from under his head to his flushed face.

"W-what are-I was sleeping." He stammered and touched the back of his hand to his mouth.
Iwaizumi laughed. It was somehow suddenly tiring how flustered he became around Iwaizumi.
Oikawa sat there awhile in contemplation. Thoughts of whether or not to tell Oikawa about Sado's visit.

"What'd you -." Iwaizumi's phone rang, interrupting his sentence.
He ignored it and kept looking at Oikawa. He chuckled and toyed with Iwaizumi's hair. "You should answer. It might be important."

Iwaizumi frowned, he wanted Oikawa to mess with him some more.
He stood up from the couch and walked away.

"Hello?...Oh, hey. --I've been good. How about you? --Yea, that's good to hear. --Really?...umm, how about tomorrow. --haha yeah. -- alright see you later."

Oikawa narrowed his eyes. He shouldn't have encouraged him.
He knew who the caller was.
But he felt guilty for not telling Iwaizumi. "Ugh, I've got an assignment I need to do tomorrow. My shift ends at five o'clock. So I probably won't be home until ten."

Oikawa pouted and threw his legs onto the couch. "You should quit college and spend more time with me." He halfheartedly joked. It wasn't so much school, rather the people that unsettled Oikawa. Iwaizumi threw his phone on the counter and came to sit beside him.

He leaned over. His chest pressed against Oikawa's. The only thing between them being cotton fabric. He slid his hands up Oikawa's arms and pinned him by his wrists on the couch. A tingling sensation never left his body. He arched his back and let out a soft moan. He quickly pressed his lips together. Iwaizumi loomed over him, he grinned from ear to ear.
"Oh really?" The words rolled off Iwaizumi's tongue with ease. Oikawa stared back red faced, unable to speak.

He slowly rose his chest and laughed. "Just kidding, baka." Iwaizumi sat up unable to control his laughter.
Oikawa turned his back to him. Embarrassed that he'd been toyed with.
"Iwa-chan-." Oikawa stopped as Iwaizumi laid his head on his thigh.
"If you ever do want to do it..." Oikawa flailed his arms above Iwaizumi's head.
"I-Iwa-chan!" He covered his hands with his face. "Don't get so hot under the collar." Hah? What does that even mean? Iwaizumi sat up and stretched. "I didn't know you were a perv Iwa-chan." Oikawa joked ignorantly. Iwaizumi pinched the bridge of his nose as he sighed.
"That wasn't sexual you dumbass."

•••

The grassy field swayed in the wind as if it were underwater. The trees whistled against the breeze as well, creating a pseudo ocarina ballad. I was asleep, though far from it. I sat up against the lovely willow tree. It's leaves shun crystal like against the beaming sunlight. Everything was as soft and as blank the noise.
I could hear. Even though I couldn't hear. I could touch. Even though k couldn't feel. The sky t'was a vulgar tinge of orange and red.
I looked around sharply for a second.
Iwaizumi was nowhere in sight. Although I couldn't understand why, I heard his voice. It called my name in the saddest of tones. It sobbed. It hurt my chest which at I groped.

Oikawa shot up in the bed. He grasped at the covers and breathed shallowly. Iwaizumi grabbed his hand. "Hey, you okay?" He didn't sound it, but his face voiced the concern his words could not. Oikawa nodded his head and glanced at Iwaizumi.
What kind of dream was that?

"I'm doing breakfast today." Iwaizumi brushed the hair out of Oikawa's face and touched his forehead.
"Do you have a fever or something?"
"I'm not sick."
"Well lay down anyway. I'll bring you your food."
He didn't want to tell him he wasn't hungry. He didn't want to make it seem like he didn't want him cooking for him. Oikawa threw the covers over his face and spoke in a muffle through the cloth. "Fine."

After Iwaizumi made him breakfast he got ready for work. If Oikawa could remember right, he worked as an intern at a children's psychiatric facility. A job that  Oikawa thought didn't really fit him, but he was happy doing it.

Iwaizumi snatched his coat from the hanger and took his keys from the pocket. Oikawa met him at the door before he left. "Don't go anywhere."
Iwaizumi pecked him on the forehead.
Oikawa smiled and returned the kiss on Iwaizumi's chin.

    Oikawa slumped in the seat and threw his feet onto the table. He let out an exaggerated sigh as he looked out the window. He remembered Iwaizumi had to stay out later than usual tonight. There're probably going to be more nights he comes home late. He thrashed about until he found a comfortable spot near the edge of the sofa. There he embraced a deep sleep.

                                 •••

    He examined his face. It was utterly cute, how cherubic he was. The way his eyes slightly opened. How his soft lips breathed in gentle breaths. Oikawa gingerly brought his hand to Iwaizumi's nape.

    He felt in the verge of crying. He knew Oikawa loved him. He was the first to confess. So why did he feel so uncertain?

    Sado seemed like Iwaizumi's dream girl. If he hadn't come back into the picture, would they have been in love?

    Would he have been happy?

Iwaizumi told him he was happy. The happiest he had ever been in his life.

    Oikawa clenched his fist and turned to bury his face in the pillow.

He thought, and it pained him.
How he didn't know how much time he had. How he knew he'd be leaving Iwaizumi here alone.
How he'd been so selfish as to agree to this love.
A feeling crept into him.
It began to eat him alive.
A feeling he'd never felt before.
He was afraid.