Lights Of The Mind | cm & al ✓

Chapter Twenty

Ashley's POV*

The guys just kind of gave me some space. I knew Spencer took Gideon's death really hard. I did too, I just tried not to show it. Gideon was a friend and a mentor.

They went about their business, except Spencer. He sat down with me.

"I know how you feel." He whispers. I sigh, not wanting to hear it. I've heard it to many times. I've lost to many people close to me. That's why I joined the FBI, to bring justice.

"Why? Why did it happen?" I huff.

"I don't know. I really don't." Spencer sighs.

I crack a small smile, "Wow. For once the Doctor doesn't know something."

"Wow Ash." Spencer shakes his head.

"But seriously. He was the person who inspired me to join. He was such a great person. I had so many memories with him. His seminars." I sigh.

"He was a great person." He nods.

I lay my head on the back of the couch. I've kept this in too long. With every death I've experienced, I try not to show it. There are times where I do, but I hate doing it. Joey walked over and leaned against the arm of the couch. "I'll let you guys talk." Spencer says.

"Thank you." I nod. Spencer got up and started talking to the other guys. Joey sat down with me and I leaned my head on his shoulder.

"What's up baby?" He asks.

"Gideon. Just hearing his name after so long. He was my mentor. A friend. An inspiration." I explain, "He was a good person. Someone who actually changed the country. Yet, he barely got any recognition and someone took his life."

"It's okay baby. He's in a safer place now. You know that." Joey whispers.

"I do know that. But why? Why was such a great man taken? He saved lives. Put away evil. He freaking created the BAU, who uses science to put away killers." I sigh.

"Hey, listen. God helped him create the team. God showed him the light. Now He is showing others. Think about it like that. Gideon changed the world." Joey says, lacing our fingers together.

I sigh and lay my head back on his shoulder. Trying to keep the tears away. Eventually they came. So, Joey pulled me onto his lap and just let me cry into his chest. This is the first time I've ever really cried about Gideon's death, but just bottling it seemed easier and it didn't bother anyone. Especially since it was my problem. Eventually my cries turned into sobs. Rarely did Gideon ever come to Nashville, but when he did, he always paid me a visit.

I lifted my head and wiped my tears. I hated this, to be honest. Here I am, a crying mess, scared for my life as well as my family's lives.

"Hey baby. It's gonna be okay. It takes time." He whispers, "You're like a boomerang."

I gave a small smile, "Really? You had to use your own song?"

He shrugs, "Eh, it works."

"I love you." I whisper.

"I love you too." He smiles.

I lent in to kiss him quickly, but he refused to pull away. It quickly turned into a make out session. Which obviously didn't bother Joey that the other guys were also in the room.