my story- unleashed

chapter 7

he kept on texting and i had to scroll up all the way back to read what he had sent while i was struggling to calm down. 

"please don't be mad baby"

"you're the only one i want in my life"

" you don't know how important it is to see you each day and hear your voice"

"sorry naaaa please forgive me"

"please talk to me baby please"

"i never ever will want to hurt you please understand that"

"i love you phoebe please"

"i am really sorry"

"punish me but please talk to me"

"you not talking to me is killing me baby please i'm sorry"

he had texted me me all these with tons of emoticons.
i hadn't realized that while i was reading herlin had jumped from her corner to mine peeking into my laptop screen.  then texting. looking at me. again texting. 
i finally thought that all this had been my mistake and he really is sorry and i smiled. fell in love again with him. 
herlin started squealing as to how lucky i am to have a boyfriend like him.
" i wish i could have someone like him!! " she said.

of course you do bitch of course. 

she returned to texting and i thought she finally is minding her business when patrick texted again.

"honey are you still upset? "

i quickly texted him back that its okay and i love him too. 
we had a good chat after a long time. 
after a lot of days i had a sound sleep.

next few days were quite normal and same. they both left me out and i would question myself why.

then came the day of some discoveries which shocked me.
it was a pleasant rainy day and we were up on his terrace. him, her and a non existent me. 
he has one of those kind of terraces where there's another level of terrace. the lower level had a room in which they had made me sit because they were "worried" that my fever might get worse.

herlin wanted to go on the second level as it was a pleasant weather and so she went. he and me sat there silently not uttering a word. we both were not talking as we used to. i had clearly shown disinterest in talking since i started noticing both of them.
i was lost in my thoughts as usual and he was looking at me then here and there when herlin called for him. she said he should come up and not miss the beautiful sky.
it indeed was beautiful.  Everything was a muted shade, like a matt photograph in a dimly lit room, everything except the tail lights that flow into the heart of the city. They shine like the first berries on winter holly: unabashedly brilliant, scarlet, hypnotic.

i too wished to go up and have a better view and that's when came another shout from herlin 
"keep phoebe inside, it is cold up here"

i was left alone.
like always.

a small drop of tear rolled down my sheek and on my black button shirt disappearing in the dark shade of the cloth. disappearing like me. 
few minutes later we went back home and silently everything had been killing me inside. everything leading me into infinite melancholy. 
"phoebe i want to tell you something" said herlin
i was ready to hear the most hurtful thing ever in the most rude way. 
temporarily destiny smiled upon me. she didn't say what i expected her to but what she said too was heart breaking.
"those sweet texts on the day you both fought, i had sent them to him to send them to you. he had asked me to send some flattering texts."

whatever little hope i was left with was gone, thrown ruthlessly in the dustbin of lies. 
i was hurt again.  the world of hate was my second home by now for i visited it most frequently.

we met that day and i acted all cool on how its okay to ask for "flattering texts" to persuade me.

i was calm like the sea water on the surface. nobody could see the turmoil under my skin.
the usual happened and i returned home. ate. slept.

slowly slowly my admiration for him started decreasing but then he'll do something small and i'll raise my hopes fall in love all over again just to get hurt again.

meanwhile all was not well in my family too. 
my friends were distancing me from them. 
my family didn't talk to me nicely. 
i was lost in a world i didn't knew. 
things had turned sour for me.