The Only Hope For Me Is You | Adam Gontier

At Least Once

"I'll be right back," I whisper, kissing Adam's lips briefly before climbing out of his bunk.
"Mmm," he responds, already half asleep. I make my way toward the kitchen, and I almost scream as I see Brad sitting on the couch in the dark.
"God, Brad! You scared me!" I hiss, sitting beside him.
"I told you I'd be here," he whispers back.
"I'm aware. You still scared me, though." I run a hand through my hair nervously.
"Sorry," he responds. I can see his blue eyes staring at me.
"So."
"So," he replies. "Are you okay?"
I don't reply for a moment. I bite my lip, absently tracing a scar on my arm under my sleeve. "At the moment, yes," I finally say.
"You weren't before." It's not a question. I look at him. His lip ring is glimmering in the dull light, and he lifts his hand to play with it.
"No," I say, tearing my eyes away from his lip ring and meeting his eyes.
"You can talk to me. You know that, right? I care about you a lot. We all do."
I smile at his words. "Yeah. Thank you." He looks into my eyes, dropping his hand and putting it on my knee. It's an innocent gesture. He doesn't mean it in a sexual way, but nonetheless, I shiver at his touch.
"Angie?" he whispers softly, his eyes searching my face.
"What?" I breathe, trying to figure out what he's thinking.
"I..." he trails off, biting his lip nervously. I tilt my head to the side, watching him carefully. "I—you probably already know, but..."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah. I know you like Adam, and I—"
"Wait. What?" I blink, starting to realize where this is going.
"I like you. I like you a lot," he blurts out, and I freeze, gaping at him in shock.
"Brad, I—" Suddenly, his lips are on mine. I can't react—the shock is too much. His lips are warm, the coolness of his lip ring contrasting the heat between our lips. He abruptly pulls away, his eyes widening as he looks at me.
"Oh god. I'm sorry."
"It's okay," I say quickly, grabbing his hand. He bites his lip ring nervously, and he looks like he's about to cry. "It's okay," I say again, squeezing his hand reassuringly.
"I can't believe I just did that—well, I can, but oh god," he rambles, pulling his hand out of mine before burying his face in his hands. I sit there awkwardly, not knowing what to do as he continues to mumble incoherently.
"I don't want things to change," I finally say, and he stops mumbling.
"Yeah?" he whispers, his voice rough.
"I like you, Brad...just...not in that way," I reply, my heart clenching as the words leave my mouth. I put my hand on his shoulder, hoping to comfort him. Realizing it isn't enough, I wrap my arms around him, and he snakes his arms around my waist, burying his face in my shoulder.
"I know," he whimpers, his weak voice making him sound like a small child who just got scolded. "We're still friends, right?" he asks after a moment, and I nod.
"Of course."
"I'll live with that," he replies, sniffling a bit. He pulls away, and I look at him. "Tell Adam, or I could talk to him tomorrow. Either way, I don't want things to get screwed up between you on account of me." He bites his lip, and my heart breaks just a little bit more. He stands up and looks at me. "I don't regret kissing you. I just had to do that at least once." With that, he goes back to bed, leaving me with a million things running through my mind.

A/N
OYE BEAN COUNTER YOU'VE DONE IT
YOU HAVE DIDDILY DONE IT not really bc if he had diddily done it we would potentially have a smol bean counter child running around in a couple of years.