"Again?!" I yelled at myself and held up the paper in disbelief. It's been around four days since that incident I caused at the cafe, and god knows how hard I kept myself with a stoic face in front of Kuroo during every remaining minutes in the classroom, wiped away all the mini notes like tossed on my desk naively thinking they were some eraser crumbs, measured my commuting time from home to school during the weekend by train, so I'd come at the very last minute every morning to not give him the time to talk when I didn't have morning practice, as I was well-aware how early volleyball practice commenced every morning. I even got asked by someone from our class whether I was on a track and field team, since that's how fast I went out of the classroom the moment the school bell was heard, and came back at the very last minute. I knew how extreme this was, but I had no idea how else to deal with this. It would've easier if I had someone I could open up to, but I don't. Not even one. Zero. Yes, 0.
Though, if you look at it from another point of view, I made a really s**t impression of myself that they would not want to meet me ever again. So that's good, I guess. But that's not what this and the other scrunched up 10 papers said.
"AHHHH!" I screamed my self out of irritation and put my hand through my hair with my last bits of energy, before my head went straight to the table with my face downwards.
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I hopelessly reiterated to myself, 'How it was just a one time meet and greet. Let it be.' But it wasn't enough to lift my face that were glued to the table and this bruise that started to form on my forehead weren't helping, since I had to help out with my dad's calligraphy store on some weekdays' late evening.
"...senpai." I heard a faint voice coming from the distance, but ignored it since I thought it was just my imagination.
"Senpai?" I heard it clearer, but still ignored it. I knew that it wasn't any of the underclassmen's voice from this club, so I didn't see the point in answering.
"UM. L/N senpai." The anonymous person whined in a nasal voice unexpectedly close to my ears, which I abruptly reacted with a soft whimper,
"Yes?" I replied as courteously as I could, with an infuriating gaze that soon softened with fear.
"You never learn your lesson, do you?" Said the no.1 person I desperately wanted to avoid from this whole wide world nonchalantly with his usual goading smirk.
"Outsiders aren't allowed in the clubroom, Ku-Kuroo..." I said as I tried to subdue this worry and felt the four days worth of effort slowly drain out of my body.
"Oh? Dropping the suffix now, are we?" He quipped, but soon became quiet. I couldn't blame him for this dour look I probably had on my face right now.
"I...I was wondering if you were okay and all..." He stuttered reticently and awkwardly rubbed the back his neck. Another side I didn't expect to see.
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