Damage Repair [Frerard Fanfic]

0.1- Boring Dreadful Days

Now this is just like any normal day... For me. Go to school, get pushed around as soon as I take my first step off the bus, get called a fag or Emo, the usual for me. That happens at home, so why shouldn't it happen anywhere else?

As I walk into class, I was greeted by just my teacher. "Mr. Iero, may I speak to you?" He looked very concerned.

"You already are, so just say it." I rolled my eyes and sat at one of the front desks.

"Ok, well, your grades are dropping drastically and if you don't pass at least three of your classes, you're going to have to be held back. Is something going on?"

"Nothing's going on, Mr. Bryar, thanks for the talk." I got up as soon as the bell rang and headed towards the back of the class in my usual seat. All the students started to fill in, and I just put on my headphones as class begun.

The rest of my next few hours sucked, and I decided to skip last period. I went to the old abandoned park just a few blocks from my house and pulled out a pack of Cigarettes. I put one of the cancer sticks inside my mouth and lit it with my trusty lighter.

I puffed away the gray smoke and watched as it flew away into the blue, dark clouded sky. As the smoke flooded my lungs, I got a text.

"Come over, I want to talk to you."-R

I pocketed my phone, and stamped out the more than halfway burnt cigarette on the ground. I headed over to my friends house and checked the time. 'School is over' I thought. 'Explains why he texted me.' As I was walking along the pavement, a car pulled up beside me.

"Hurry up, get in." It was Ray.

"Wow, kidnapper much?" I chuckled and opened the door.

"Yes, and I'm taking you to my house."

"I know. I got your text." I shook my phone in my hand and waved it in his face.

"Yeah. Okay, let's go, I'm hungry." He stepped on the gas and drove to his place.

I opened the door and looked at the 'fro man. "Why did you want to talk to me?"

"I, um, I'll tell you inside." We walked up to his porch and he opened the front door. I sat on his couch, he offered me a drink, but I declined because the only drink I needed right now is alcohol.

"So what is it you wanted to tell me?" I sat cross legged and propped myself up by my elbow on the armrest.

"Okay... So there's this boy..."
So wait, Ray is gay. Explains a lot. I mean I'm not being rude, because I'm not a homophobe and Ray knows that I will hurt someone if somebody makes fun of someone's sexuality.

"Really? You should've told me you were gay, man. Who is it?"

"Do you know..." He mumbles it, but I can't make it out.

"Ray, you can tell me anything we've been friends for six years now." I lean in close.

"Do you know Pete Wentz?" So that's who it is.

"Yes! Oh my god, you have a crush on Pete!"

"Yeah, but he never really notices me." he looks down and I see his eyes brim with tears. I tilt his chin up.

"Hey. You're an awesome guy, you're fun to hang out with, and you have an awesome personality. I'm sure he noticed you."

"You sure?" A tear slipped down his face, but I quickly wiped it.

"I'm sure." I then got another text. 'Why aren't you home, faggot? Your damn mother is worried.' Fuckin' father. Let's be real I don't call my 'father' dad. I hate him, he's a stupid idiotic drunk. I got up. "Hey, Ray, I need to go home. I'll, uh- I'll talk to you tomorrow, yeah?"

"Oh um yeah. See ya!" I walked out of his house and ran to my house quickly. Ray doesn't know that my dad beats me, but he does know that I get bullied at school.

And it all happens when I open the door. "WHERE THE HELL WERE YOU?" My so called 'father' shouts.

"I was talking to a friend." I try walking up the stairs, but he blocks my path.

"Did I say you can talk to anyone?"

"Do you even have to? It's my life and my life decisions of who I want to be with and who I want talk to!-" smack! My head jerked to the side as the aftermath of his hand hitting my face. I wanted to cry, but I knew if I did, I'd get more of a beating for being a 'pussy'. I already know that I just have to take it until he's done.

After a while of getting beaten and bruised, I ran upstairs to my room, slammed my door and locked it. I slid down the door and started sobbing. 'Why doesn't anyone care anymore?' I thought. I suddenly had an itch that I haven't felt in a couple of months. [v triggering, skip until next bracket]

I ran into my bathroom and opened the drawer. There, there was razors, blades, matches, lighters and gauze. I took out one of the razor blades and held it to my forearm. It started out with simple lines, but tears were flooding my eyes and rolling down my white, porcelain, beaten up face, which made me not see so clearly and cut deeper and deeper down my arm.

[ PROCEED WITH READING]
I'll say it once and I'll say it again, I hate myself and I want to die. After that whole thing happened, I gauzed up my arm and threw on my hoodie. I went to my bed, put in my headphones, and rolled onto my side. And all I can say is that I cried myself to a deep, dark sleep.

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Hey guys! Was that a good chapter? Was it depressing? I know I like suspense and shtuff. Trust me it'll get better than this after a couple chapters, I just needed to update and people are actually reading this and I'm happy. So yeah.

Peace, love, and everything emo

~Clarissa✌🏼️❤️💀