am I dreaming??

Part 22

"I'm really sorry Michelle, I feel bad" Lena said not making direct eye contact.

"It's fine Lena I'm really happy for you, going to France will be fun" I said assuring her for the tenth time that it's fine with me. Yeah its been my dream to go to Paris France for as long as I can remember but I've never got the opportunity to go.

"You know, I really like Louis Michelle, I've never been so serious with anyone" she looked happy she's much more herself.

"I know you're really great together, I think that he's really good for you after all your heartbreaks you deserve someone like him"

it's true she had her fair amount of men in her life but they would always do something to make her break up with them. Honestly she's a difficult to compromise with and she always wants things her way. But I think Louis understand how she is and loves her for that.

"Yeah but not as much as you though, love isn't really your thing, and now Harry as well -"

she was talking too fast she didn't think about what she said. 'Love isn't my thing' the words replayed back in my mind. Yeah sure I haven't had something serious but it's not that I don't take things serious, I do actually I just know when something is real or not and people don't get that.

I didn't know how to feel about what Lena said, it hurts and made me feel self continuous.

"Michelle I didn't mean it like that"
Lena said when I didn't response.

"It's fine " I said leaning my head against my arm.

"Harry is a mess" she said signing
"He's not eating much and he looks like a zombie" I know she's telling the truth but I didn't expect him to be this way, I don't know why he's so miserable, I should be the one that feels bad and look like a zombie.

"I talked to him yesterday" I confess looking at my laptop screen

"Really? What did he say?" I know she didn't expect us to talk and neither did I but I'm happy that he wants to talk because I can't keep living with this giult and stress.

"He texted me saying he wants to talk..." I didn't really know what to say because we didn't say much at all.

"He does? Wow I honestly didn't expect him to say that,not in a bad way but I've got to know him better and I noticed that he's not someone to show emotion, he doesn't talk about his problems and he defiantly doesn't apologise"

I was a little taken back by her words, I knew he wasn't someone to talk much about how he feels but it's weird for me because I got to know the fun and happy Harry and not the mad and moody Harry Lena got to know.

"Michelle, he's trying and I realise that now" she rubbed her forehead frowning at the thought of Harry wanting to maybe work things out

"Well it's just that... I don't know what to say, when will we talk, where will we talk? You know those questions. And I don't know how Harry feels about this, I don't know where he wants to take things, I don't even know if we were anything?"

I felt like crying,I haven't had the chance to really tell anyone how I feel and I feel as if all my emotions are just as confused as me.

"Mich, listen to me, you're the one that always tells me that things get better in time, time is like the word you always use because in time things will find it's way and if it doesn't it's not the end. What I mean is that Harry wants to talk, so that's good, he's going to open up and to me that's great. Just stay strong I'll keep an eye on him and I'll let you know how things go."

I was stunned, Lena isn't usually the one that give advice she's always talking, she's much like Louis. I loved her advice and wished I had spoken to her earlier. I want to tell her about the guy I kissed but I don't want to change the subject and I know she'll think I'm acting like Harry.

"Thank you Lena I appreciate it a lot" I say feeling much better.

"Always, but I'll talk to you later and I'll send you tons of pictures, love you" she was rushing her words a little so I assumed Louis is calling her.

"Bye, love you"

I signed feeling relieved, I felt better and not so alone and confused. There's still a lot of questions I have about Harry but he's the only one that can answer it.

I signed feeling relieved but still a little confused. I closed the laptop debating what I'm going to do for the rest of the day. It's only 13:00 but I wish it was bedtime because I have nothing to do, I'm still waiting for my exam results and it's killing me I hate this tipe of stress but I studied really hard so I'm hoping for the best!

I walked towards the living room and picked up my phone from the table.

I saw I had 3 texts and opened them

From: Niall

Helloooooo! We have a break for 2 weeks and I thought I'd come visit you whatcha think?

I smiled at the text, I love Niall he's like my second best friend. I was really excited to see Niall.
I assumed while Lena and Louis are in France Niall will come here.

I decided to text right away.

To: Niall

From: Michelle

YAY!!!!! I'm so excited Ni. When will you come?

I'm the tipe of person that plans everything out and the fact that I have nothing to do today bothers me more than some people might think.

My heart skipped a beat when I saw who the next text is from.

From: Curly

Michelle, I'll be in town for the next two weeks, we can talk then

I felt like my heart could just jump out of my throat because I'mhappy that I get to see Harry and we get to talk but the way he sends his texts now a days, I just feel down about all of this.

I decided to text back.

To:Curly

From: Michelle

Thank you Harry

I pressed the send button debating whether that was the right thing to say. I am thankful about all of  this but still I would rather just try and  forget about all of this.

.

The rest of the evening I decided to go to the gym. It's been a while since I've been there and I need to get in shape. Luckily I've always liked to exercise so it wasn't that big of a task for me.

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

HELLO !!!!!

I actually wrote another chapter !! I missed  writing a lot and I'm glad I decided to write again..
I'm really sorry for not writing much in a really long time but I haven't been much motivated and I've been extremely busy.

I want to thank this lovely girl for motivating me to publish another chapter so go and thank her 😀 xxx

call_me_Trace