In The Closet

Hate in My School

I'm a Freshman in highschool. I know that seems very young and even younger to be so sure of my sexuality but I'm mature and I just go with the flow.

If my sexuality changes, then I'll roll with it. Although it hasn't changed in the 15 years I've been alive despite all the straight Disney.

Anyway, this story is about when I was asked on my opinion of homosexuality by very aggressive homophobes.

To set the scene, I was in home ec, which they had to rename as some long stupid name. I don't care. (I get so sidetracked)

Well, I was sitting with 2 guys which I will name Smokey and Dumbbells so that they are not hated on if my identity is ever found out. I'm that nice even though they don't deserve it.

They began talking about the few open homosexuals in our highschool, none to kindly. Saying things they should do like, 'die in a ditch' , 'long walk off a short pier' , 'die of aids' and even more terrible comments.

Of course, no one in the class thought any of us were anything but straight so many people chimed in with more hate comments while I kept my mouth shut like a smart person.

They began asking opinions of people who hadn't shared theirs already and it occurred to me the would probably ask of mine soon. So, I silently had a panic attack while trying to think of what I would say.

I hadn't thought of a single word when Dumbbells turned to me and said, 'So, how about you? Do you like homosexuals?"

Everyone seemed to stare deep within me and I was sure they could tell just by looking at me. I wanted to stick up for the odd people out but I didn't want too get beat up neither.

I took a deep, courageous breath and decided truth is best.

And that's what I did. I told the truth. Sort of.

I said slowly, "I don't really know." Which is true because I base people on their personality, not their sexual preference.

I was prepared to go on and explain what I just did to you, good reader, but Dumbbells cut me off.

"Good. That's great. They all deserve to have their brains bashed in." He was generally happy at my answer.

So, I say there. Half thanking a God I don't believe in and the other half thinking ' What the fuck just happened?'

It took me a moment but I came to the conclusion that he didn't hear me correctly. Or that he did.

Here's what I mean. I said, "I don't really know," which sounds just the same as 'I don't really, no.' I was speaking very slow so he might have thought that. I'm rather sure he did.

Either way, I'm sure it saved my ass from a beating. Yay for homophones.