Trust Me

Chapter 9

Trust me Chapter 9

A wave of guilt washed over me.

As soon as I woke up this morning; all I felt was guilt.

My brother is dead and I had a good time last night.

What’s wrong with me?

I’m such a horrible person.

I was happy, when I should be grieving.

I heard the door creak open. I lifted my head and saw Emma sneak in my room. She softly stepped on the floor boards making her way onto my bed, sitting on the far corner. She noticed I was awake, she gave me a smile and said; “Morning Amy,” I gave her a lazy smile in return.

“What time is it?” I asked her as I began to slowly sit up. She looked over my shoulder, on the night table, which apparently had an alarm clock I just noticed.

“10:30.” She responded. I nodded, stretched my arms over my head and yawned. “Do you want some coffee?” She asked, I shook my head. She sighed, “I took my shower, so it’s all yours.” She attempted to get off the bed, and then suddenly spun around again. “I don’t have that much for breakfast, I have cereal.” She bit her bottom lip, like she was nervous for me to say it wasn’t good enough.

“It’s fine, I love cereal.” I reinsured her; she nodded and walked out the door. I got out of the bed and crouched down by my suitcase to find my shampoo and conditioner I packed. Once I found it, I grabbed the bottles and headed towards the bathroom. I quickly got out of my clothes and jumped right into the shower.

Most of that time was spent thinking of Emma biting her lip when all she could offer me was cereal. I find it so strange how people suddenly change how they act towards others once they get ‘known’. For starters, every hotel I stayed in, during my fathers campaign, they offered the absolute best, fresh pancakes, bacon and freshly squeezed orange juice, what did the other guests get? The buffet in the small eating room. I wish people would realise that I am normal like them, I don’t want the high end pancakes, or bacon, I could do just fine with a bowl of cheap cereal and no-pulp orange juice from the grocery store.

When I was younger, I’ve seen the most ridiculous things about ‘stars in Hollywood’, I would take the odd glance at the magazines my mother bought, sneaking peeks while she wasn’t there. I saw so many articles on how Stars, just like us! Showing pictures of them buying toilet trees, or food. Everyone needs them, no matter how your social status is, or if you have none at all, we are the same, just a little bit different on the inside.

I finished my shower and dried off. Wrapping the towel around my soaking hair and body, I ran back into my room for the time being and found a change of clothes. I slipped into a pair of jeans and t-shirt, nothing fancy.

Leaving the towel wrapped around my head, like a turban. I left the room and met Emma in the kitchen. She was sitting on the couch, over her bowl of cereal paying attention to the music videos on the television. I started opening cupboards to find the bowls, then I heard Emma talking to me over my shoulder, “The bowls are in the cupboard beside the fridge, spoon’s are below the bowls.” She instructed. I did so, I went to the fridge and opened the cupboard and there were a range of bowls to choose from, then I got my spoon and grabbed the cereal box that Emma left out for me. I reached into the fridge and pored the rest of the milk from the container.

With my cereal in hand I went to the couch and joined her watching the music videos, we didn’t say anything, just watched the flickering lights from the television.

***

　

Emma left later that afternoon. I really didn’t know what to do with myself, wait for her to return? Go out and get noticed? After lunch, I decided. My whole purpose was not hiding in this apartment, that’s not even mine, but to find answers. I got dressed; I threw on a sweatshirt . I threw my damp hair in a twisted bun, placed my sunglasses on and left.