if you're reading this..

Fetter

There once was a time, when I'd give you the world. You had a woman that'd do anything for you and you traded her in. Some people look for years to find a person with those qualities. You never gave me a chance to prove myself. You lied to me and played with my head. Please tell me what you gained? How did this benefit you?
I wake up in the dark of pitch black night with cold sweats searching to see if you're lying next to me, only to find you're gone. I cry myself to sleep sometimes when you cross my mind. I dread every second I have to lower my head and avoid eye contact when we pass by. & I can never do the same shit we did together with someone else. Everytime I think about your hands on her and her body tangled in yours. I get nauseas, I can't breathe,  and I begin to hyperventilate. Everytime I smell something that reminds me of you. Tears form in my eyes and I have to lie about why I'm randomly crying at all the wrong times in all the wrong places. & Everytime I hear our friends say your name it sends me back into a spastic fit of heart attack because I never had the time to mourn over the death of us. Everyone told me that wasn't acceptable, that I couldn't give you that satisfaction. "The best way to get over someone, is to get under someone else," right? Wrong. Because it fucking hurts when you're not here, it's like you came in my life you robbed me of my oxygen and took every ounce of affection. But that didn't pleasure you enough so you robbed me of my freedom. I am bound to you. I think, breathe, and dream you.
But
Don't worry it only hurts when I'm breathing, that's the only time I suffer. So, I guess that's good, except for the fact that's every second of the day.
And
Everything's fine as long as I'm occupied, but everything comes to an end, you taught me that. & when I finally sit still, your face appears once again.
How could you say you loved me?
Because
You fucking lied.