at first i was welcomed
i love them
they're my family
but how come i see
the same ones ignoring me
i feel something is chopping down this family tree...
i've been feeling left out
without a doubt
i might as well shout
i'm leaving!
but one there will miss Sabian
they're have been
to many rejections
is it time to move on from these betrayals?
should i leave them for these new loves i've grown to know?
they've accepted me in only week
the others
they threw me out
before i could even shout
i'm sorry
for being your friend too
for having to have you all choose
but i fought in a battle i knew i'd lose
in the end you threw me away like an old pair of shoes
like they're riddled with mud
like druggie in rehab but still fucks with the drugs
like i was completely fine
like i didn't need any time
then they left me out
like i did the crime
it was likea staged homicide, someone shot a gun
but i called it mine
in the end,
how many of us are real friends?
how many will chew you up and spit you out wolves in their den?
how many of us are real friends?
how many will change the different camera lense?
how many of us are real friends?
how many of you will attend my own end?
how many of you fucking assholes are my real friends?
leave me out
with all above me is rain clouds
and all i hear are the sounds
the sounds of disappearance
i've heard no sounds of support since
way back when
i can hardly remember
me
myself and i
until i die
yeah that's the shit something to remember
and if you don't like me
write a fucking a letter.
to those who may concern/who know me personally:
i'm leaving band in order to not quit Say Si. This program is not full of judges and other higher elites, we are equal in this sense of talent. writers, actors, directors. we are all here to gather. i felt welcomed once in band but now i feel left out from everyone and everything. and it's not y'alls fault at all. it's entirely mine. i made the decision, so fuck it, i'm done, i'm done pretending, i'm done listening, i'm done trying work out if i was the fuck up. i know i was and i still fucking am. i felt no support from anyone, honestly, it's been pissing me the fuck off. and yes, you have your rights and i have mine, but shit, i guess i've felt no support. so i'm leaving to become the person my destiny wished for me to become, i'm leaving to be a writer, an artist of words, a typewriter stuck on a single story. i'm leaving because the ones who believe that they won't take sides, only see the one side to take and that is to just i don't know, not ... i don't fucking know anymore. so that's it. bye band, shit would've never helped anyway.
how many of us are real friends?
real friends with no ends
real friends where i mean something
real friends when they hope i'm coming
real friends i can trust
real friends because it's not a must
real friends, friendship that sucks
real friends
define it
design it
hope one day, again, i'll find it.
"I believe in you sabian
you're in this for life now kid
dude, your writings are good, have you showed this to people?"
- new friends
bye.
YOU ARE READING
Kill Me, I'm 3 Faced (VII)
Poetrywhat a time to be alive right? these events take place from January 2016 to March 2016