Let Me Be Your Superhero

Prologue

Fuck.

I fucking hate school, but then again who doesn't. A lot of people like the first day; there's no work and you're reunited with your friends. I basically live at my friend's houses during the summer so I didn't have that to look forward to. I spent the majority of my morning being pouty about not being in many classes with my friends, and sat at the back of my friendless classes sulking.

I've just started 11th grade. I'm a pretty decent student with pretty decent marks. But I've been "decent" my entire life, never bad but never outstanding. And I'm not just refering to school.

Finally it came to lunch after what felt like the longest morning ever. I saw my friends at our usual table and Chey waved at me to come over. The table was slightly more crowded than usual and I'm not sure how I felt about this.

Cheyenne, or Chey as we all called her, finally got together with Ashton, the boy she'd had a crush on since 8th grade. Alexis had invited Michael to eat with us and as usual Serena and Calum sat at their end of the table, so absorbed in eachothers company that it was as if they weren't even there. They had been dating since the beginning of 9th grade. We are all betting on how long it would take after high school for them to get married; I have 20 bucks on 5 years. So that's my lunch table, 4 girls and 3 boys. Each girl has a boy except me. And I'm not in the slightest bit surprised.

I'm 16 years old. I've never kissed a boy, never been asked out on a date, I haven't even been kissed on the cheek. Everyone says I'm beautiful but I don't believe them because if I was so fucking beautiful then why does nobody want me? These are the thoughts that clouded my mind on a daily basis. I'm 3 months clean, haven't done anything all summer; my friends were a pleasant distraction. But being back in school all the thoughts that haunted me throughout the past year came flooding back like they'd never left. I'm not good enough. I'm a weirdo.

The bell rung and I realized that I hadn't eaten anything, nor had I spoken to any of my friends, but its not like they noticed. I rushed to my 3rd period calculus class, I had this one with Alexis, my only class with her.

Alexis was my best friend. People always got us confused because her name is Alexis and my name is Lexi, but it's the reason we became friends in the first place.

We sat at the back and she spent the whole class going on about Michael.

Michael is the most beautiful human being I've ever seen in this entire planet.

He likes pizza and I like pizza too we are so perfect for eachother.

I wish he would just ask me out already.

Do you think he likes me?

Lex?

I'd zoned out and hadn't realized she was speaking to me instead of at me.

"Oh, uh yea definitely, who wouldn't you're incredible"

"Oh my god I hope so."

I spent the rest of class reading the book I'd gotten from my english teacher this morning. The book wasn't assigned but I wanted to get ahead, and I also forgot that I had a spare last period and had nothing else to do.

After class I put my stuff in my locker and found a nice spot down the hall next to a plug so I could charge my phone. I picked up my book and continued reading.

I was reading Wuthering Heights. I love to read, but I could barely understand what the fuck was going on in this story. I was 20 pages in and still wasnt entirely sure what was going on or where anyone was.

I'm quiet, and I gain most of my knowledge from observing other people. Sometimes I'm just curious, or get distracted. 4th period hadn't started yet and people were still walking through the halls, so I decided to look at their shoes.

I have somewhat of a fascination with shoes. They can say so much about a person, and I believe more so than the clothes they wear.

new Dr. Martens, old black hi-top Converse, worn out Vans, 2 different coloured TOMS, dirty white flipflops, neon orange running shoes, white Converse, shiny new Supra's...

The halls cleared out and everyone went to class, so I picked up my book and started reading until the end of the day.

***

Once the bell rung I stood up and walked over to my practically empty locker. I opened it and a folded up white piece of paper fell to the ground. I looked around to see if anyone had dropped it and it hadn't come from my locker, but there was nobody near me yet. I picked it up and like anyone else would and opened it. I took another look around for anyone else who this could belong to but still nobody was there. I had a hard time believing it was meant for me. I read it over again and my jaw dropped.

You are the most beautiful girl I've ever seen in my entire life. -LH