Briar Preparatory Academy

Vigilance

Joe POV

I walk out of the room, my head hanging in shame. I shut the door on my way out of Celeste's cell. Jasper stands waiting for me in the hall. His face is bright red and his fury is barely contained.

"I meant what I said, boy. I catch you helping her again I will make you pay in ways that you could never imagine. You will regret your life." He growls before spinning on his heel and leaving me standing alone in the hallway. I look down at my bloodstained hands. I raise my right hand which is gripping my pocket knife. This is never what it was intended for.

My parents gave me the knife on my birthday the year before my dad disappeared. They had told me that it was always good to have, but that I should never use it unless it was of the utmost importance. They trusted me to make good decisions with it; they trusted me to use it for good. Regardless of how Jasper raised me, this didn't feel right. I walk down the hallway to my room and immediately stumble into the bathroom. Everywhere I touch I leave a streak of blood. Everywhere I go, I leave a trail of destruction.

I wash my hands in the white sink, the water staining red and flowing down into the drain. Next, I grab my knife and rinse it off, guilt heavy in my stomach like a boulder. I dry my hands and my knife and stick it back into my jeans. It is one of the things I have always kept with me. My knife and my mother's necklace.

I leave my room, locking the door behind me and heading down the hallway to the security room. I keep my head low, trying to suppress the pain shooting through my head and shoulders, creating a piercing headache. I unlock the door to the security room and walk in, shutting and locking the door behind me. I walk over to the monitor on the desk, and slump down into the chair.

I watch her on the monitor as she drags herself up against the wall, breathing heavily. Between all her bruises, her cracked rib, and her new wounds from today, I'm surprised she's still alive. Most of our other clients are killed by this point. Either from excessive amounts of injuries, starvation, or a simple bullet to the head.

No one that we take in this building goes out alive.

I lean my head into my hands, rubbing my temples as the headache subsides. I'm learning to ignore it. I squeeze my eyes shut, trying to block everything out.

A cry of pain reverberates from the monitor, causing me to leap out of the chair and train my eyes on the screen. Celeste is tying her shirt around her arm, creating a tourniquet to slow and stop the bleeding. She gasps in pain and it takes all my willpower to stay where I am. I force my eyes away from the screen. I can't do this.

I turn the volume all the way down. I can't listen to her screams. I watch as she leans against the wall with her shirt tied around her arm, the blood staining her gray t-shirt. I look at her ribs, which are becoming more visible from several days with little to eat. I see her torso, which is black and blue along with her arms.

Several thoughts run through my mind all at once, but I lock them away. I'm too soft around her. I shake my head and turn the volume back up on the monitor. She has stopped screaming and is waiting for the bleeding to stop and slow. For a moment, I think that she has stopped breathing she is so still. She gazes down at her arm in wonder, almost as if it doesn't hurt at all and is merely a fascinating thing to look at. Then she pulls her knees up to her chin and buries her face in her hands. The action makes her look so small, so vulnerable. I suddenly wonder what she was like as a child, when she probably didn't have a care in the world and didn't know what pain she would have to endure in the future.

Pain that I inflicted.

It still shocks me how a person can make you question all your motives and beliefs. I've been raised to glaze over other people's feelings, because feelings destroy. But at the same time, I don't think that I've ever questioned myself so much about my own morals. Jasper told me I should never care, because when you care you have something to lose.