The Thug's Model

Exsisting for money part 2

We didn't leave until Katrina rocked our worlds. Did God know that my mom's world was already shaken til it was in shambles, split perfectly down the middle?
Houston, Texas 2005 3rd ward
I felt like those idiotic clowns that rode in a fully packed car until they stopped to get out. Angèl decided he was going to sleep with his legs all the way open. I nudged his big head that fell my way when we hit a small bump in the road.
"I'm hungry."I broke the icy silence. She glanced at me with her milk chocolate eyes. She looked so beaten, almost as if she was an angel casted away from the gates destined for hell.
"We're almost there. Your maw maw will be waiting with a big pot of gumbo and sweet lemonade." She replied to us and herself.
I didn't see her rich golden skin turn a sickly yellow. I didn't see how sad her eyes looked. I didn't see the red eyes and enlarged pupils. Most importantly I don't see the needle marks permanently engraved like she was a cow. My mom was having a huge battle with her demons and I just couldn't see.
2009
"ARI!!! I told you bout Gettin' here 'fo the street light turn on." My maw maw waved her belt in the air. I could hear Lucas ugly little laugh from the other room. I held back my tongue as it tried to lurch forward. God knows I did not want another slap to the mouth. This wouldn't even be happening right now if Lucas kept his stupid ass shut. Need I remind myself that I gave him a dollar? Fifteen years old and I still got to have a bedtime.
"Yes'm I'm sorry." She patted my cheek.
"I know babeh but I don't want you to end up like yo brothers. They think the runnin dem streets when it's runnin dem. I saw you with dat fast tail girl Ari..don't let me catch you doing something you got no business doin'."
I know that was her way of looking out for me. She did her best to tend to us but she was tired. I mean you try raising two kids and only having one left. The other one might as well be dead. Walking fast to Lucas bedroom he shared with Angèl, I ripped the door open.
"WHAT I TELL YOU?!! CAN'T EVEN KEEP A SECRET!!" I immediately jumped on his eight year old body and started pinching his legs.
"NOOO!! Ari, Rafael said I needa look out for you." I stopped and looked into his light green eyes. Look out for me? Rafael the one who joined a gang and started slanging. We haven't even seen him since last Thursday. I remember him and Angèl getting into a big fight about money. It ended with Angèl with a nice ring around his eye. It scared me how Angèl looked at Rafael almost reminded me of the monster. He packed what clothes he had and left. Sometimes we get seven hundred dollars in the mail, I like to think its from him. Too hurtful to think otherwise.
"What chu mean look after me? I ain't doin nothin wrong." He squinted his eyes at me.
"That's what I said but he still said to watch out n I'm in charge." He smiled goofily at that. I rolled my eyes dramatically. When I proceeded to walk out the bedroom Lucas pulled me back.
"Nightmares again?" I asked sympathetically. His light brown spiral curls moved back and forth as he shook his head yes.
"I'll be right back." Quickly running into my room I change into pajamas. When I came back his Spider-Man nightlight was on and he laid awake in his bed. I slid in next to him, holding him like a fragile doll. After a while he spook.
"Do you think mom will get better?" He knew bits of details about our mother but I made sure to shield him from the truth. I was always gonna protect him no matter how hard it hurt me.
"Yeah." Maw maw once told me if you say something enough times it might come true. But why do I doubt myself? He fell asleep in my arms. I prayed he didn't hear the truth in my lie.