Apart from beginning with two As, and thus being as fantabulicious as "aa" and "Aaron-Martin," the noteworthy thing about aardvarks is that an aardvark is the mascot of my sad, crumbly little school, Cortez Junior High.
I wish I was making a joke, but I'm not. Not about the relative crumpliness of the school itself, and certainly not the about the pure, unadulterated sadosity of having an aardvark in your cheering section. It's very hard to get enthused about a sport when the thing that is cheering you on is a giant, slow-moving, piglike mammal that in real life drags itself on stubby legs through hot sandy deserts, snuffling ants, and hoping to die.
2. I assume all aardvarks are suicdal. Because, really, what do they have to live for?
Inexplicably, it was decided that this creature should also be purple. Which you might have guessed, my school places last in most sporting events. In comparison, the mascot of our chief rival, the Prescott School for the Unnaturally Athletic, winners of every sporting event they have ever taken part in, is a large and ferocious, normal-colored lion.
You never want to get a detention on game days. Because then you have to wear the Aardie suit and spend hours running for your life from the (not) hilarious antics of the Prescott Lion. It is like being mauled by a vicious carnivore with paws the size tennis rackets while entombed in a cocoon of stale sweaty socks and old spitballs as your so-called friends die too young from fits of laughter while occasionally shouting your name and whistling.
Book by Karen Rivers for 5.99 U.S dollars. This book may not seem like not now but it gets good trust me.
Remember
Vote, Comment, Share
Hugs/Kisses😘❤️
YOU ARE READING
The Encyclopedia Of Me
Fiksi Remaja{By Karen Rivers NOT ME} Buy this book its really good 5.99 US Aaron-Martin, Tink. That's me, aged almost thirteen, the star of this encyclopedia. I wrote it in my spare time during the weirdest, most wonderful summer of my life. I had a lot of spa...
