Journey of the Mind

Zach

It is 10 in the morning, and I am finally awake. Deciding that I don't want my mother coming up here nagging at me 24/7. I got up and started to get ready for the day. I smell the sweet special cookies mother makes every 3 months. Hurrying and rushing out, my foot hits my dresser hard. Causing some of the stuff on there to fall. After a few minutes of calming down my pain, I realize that Nicole's bracelet is on the floor.

Nicole...

Last night she was with me and I loved how stubborn she was. She was next to my bed as I was sleeping. Saying something I didn't quite catch. Sleep was taking a hold of me and Nicole was holding me. Moving me. Seeing her makes me want to protect her, to be her rock, and to be what she deserves.

Most of all I wish to reveal my secret to her. How do I tell her this? How will she take it? Would she ever consider keeping me around? I have no idea. The secret makes my heart feel heavy and full of regret. Why must it be this way? Am I becoming my bastard of a father? He never did anything for my mother. He left her and me on the day I was born. 4 years later his death was posted in the newspapers in California. Will I one day become him? Do awful things like him? I only wish to protect her. There is no way out of it. Next time I see her. I shall reveal my secret.

May my mind be at ease at last...?

"Zach! Come down here this instant!" Mother calls.

Running down to the bakery, I see my mother with the last person I expect. Anger runs through me as his eyes examine me. He isn't supposed to come back. He wasn't supposed to be in the city. But something is different. He doesn't have the mischievous look he always has. He looks like his needs help. But why trust someone who is being chased by the cops?

"Hi...son." He is wearing a plain black shirt and a leather jacket. Some old pants and the same shoes I met him in.

My mother looks at me and starts to question what he is doing here and how I happen to know him. "Why did he call you son? He isn't even your father."

"Mom. Can I just have a moment with him, alone? I'll explain once I am done." I say. She looks back and forth between him and me. She nods and leaves to go attend the bakery. We stay here in the backroom, where we cook all the muffins and junk. "What the hell was that?" I yell.

"What? I can't call you son?" He gives me a smile to show that he joking. Joking or not I can't handle how he deals with things. Thinking that it is ok to say something when it isn't. Causing me more trouble and making me clean up his mess. 

"No, you cannot. I am not even your son. I know you have guilt problems and I let it slide so many times, but you were in front of my mother and now I have to lie to her." I pause. Turning around, trying to calm myself down and think straight. So many things come to mind on how I just want to show him a piece of my mind. Wanting to just punch him or at least torture him a bit to show that he shouldn't joke like that. After I was done with my thoughts, I faced him again. "What are you doing here anyway? I thought you were being chased by the cops."

"First of all," He gets up from his chair. "They are called The Port. Second, they are on to me. I don't know how they know, but now my cover is blown. All I know is that they have info on me sneaking around alone." He smiles.

The way he said alone was so obvious. He has been alone for many years that its what they expect. The Port expect him to come back alone. To be spotted in plain sight alone. "I know what you're thinking, and no. I already have to explain enough to my mother. How am I going to explain this? Plus, what happened to the guy that was depressed or something. I came down and you looked like you wouldn't be able to see another day."

"That's called playing the part. I had to pull that part in order gain your mom's trust. Now, are you going to help me or not?"

I don't know what came over me, but I quickly agreed for him to stay here. Things are not going to be running smoothly. Even without him here it still won't be running smoothly. Fuck my life.

__________________________

I stayed in the back trying to figure out what I will say to my mother. As for him, he went out to gather his stuff. It gives me a good ten more minutes before he comes back. Ten minutes to explain everything. I've only gathered so much when my mother came in through the door. "There are no customers that need me right now and I still need that explanation. So what is going on Zach?"

I take a deep breath, tring to lie myself through this, and hope for the best. "The man you saw one of my friends dad. He got the short end of the stick a few days ago with his wife and now he can't go back until he makes up for it. So he needs a place to stay."

"That doesn't explain why he called you son."

Damn him for making my life a living hell right now. "I know my friend very well, so I know his dad very well. Been going to his house a lot. You know, those times you let me visit my friend? He has seen me long enough to consider me as a second son. Just like you that one girl, always coming in here, ordering the same muffin and sitting in the same place just to cry over the loss of her uncle. You consider her as a daughter, so this is normal, isn't it?"

She stares straight into my eyes, trying to find any sign of lies. I know that if I look away, she will think I am lying. I can't even change my facial expression. Thankfully the bell at the desk counter rings and my mother stops staring. She believes my lie and walks away to attend the new customer. It feels awful to lie to her, but I doubt that she will take the truth very lightly.