Complicated Blue: The Extraordinary Adventures of the Good Witch Anaïs Blue

Grounded

Anais stared down at her hands.

Those damned baby hands.

She twiddled her thumbs. She dropped her shoulders and sulked. It was the fourth time in a week that Nan had sent her to her room. She was getting too old for this kind of thing. She wasn't a baby anymore. Couldn't Nan see that? Anais looked down at her body and regrettably answered her own question. No, Nan couldn't see that. Nan only saw a small child, a five-year-old.

She looked around her room. It was filled with everything a little girl could want; dolls and stuffed toys, make-up and plastic jewellery, lego. She even had a four-posted bed with canopy. Everything had gaudy colours, everything sparkled. Where was she living? Was she a princess in a castle? No, she was definitely not that. She had to admit that once it had been all she thought about. She had been obsessed by little plastic things with bright colours. She would spend hours studying their tiny details. Everything had to have livid colours. Everything had to twinkle or flash bright lights. She had been like a crow. It wasn't her anymore. It hadn't been her for a long time. She wasn't a little girl, she was practically an adult. She was going to be eighteen in a few days. Why was it that Nan didn't remember this?

She was sick of carrying on the charade of being a helpless toddler. It wasn't really her. Sure, she was limited physically and she understood that it was necessary for them to do that performance in public. But in private it should be different. They weren't that far apart in age. By her calculations, Nan could only be about ten or fifteen years older.

Why was Nan in charge anyway? She could take care of herself. She didn't need any help.

She flipped through the pages of her Promptuary. Maybe there was a spell she could cast. Maybe there was a concoction she could drop in Nan's drink so that she could give her the slip. She wanted out. She wanted to be alone. She didn't want this overbearing adult dictating her life anymore. She had enough of being ordered around. She would tell Nan what she thought of her. She began to get herself worked up. She grabbed a Barbie doll and tried unsuccessfully to twist off its leg. She didn't have the strength. It frustrated her even more. She threw the doll into the far corner of her bedroom. It bounced off the pink blow-up teddy bear and came flying back towards her. She ducked to avoid it.

She looked down at the Promptuary. The open page lit up. It showed her Nan sitting alone in the kitchen. She looked very unhappy. She was staring vacantly into the empty coffee cup in her hands. Anais watched as Nan squeezed the cup tightly. The whites of her knuckles showed and the cup handle snapped off under the pressure. She watched as Nan sighed, her shoulders lifting and dropping. Nan released her grip on the cup. She picked up the broken handle and threw it towards the bin in the corner. It shattered against the wall.

Anais looked up from the book when she heard the sound through her bedroom door. She realised it was pointless getting angry with Nan. She also realised it was unfair. Nan was in the same position, she was also unhappy. Nan was trapped, just like her.

For the first time, she thought for a moment what it must be like for Nan. She hadn't considered Nan's predicament before. It was a new way of thinking for her.

Where had this thought come from? Was this what growing up was all about?

She was confused. Maybe they just needed to talk about it. Usually Nan settled the arguments. She was the one who would bring about the calm. Anais thought about it for a minute and realised that she also had control over the situation. They didn't need to fight like they were doing. She could go make the peace. If she did then maybe Nan would look at her differently. Maybe Nan would see the adult in her and treat her more as an equal.

It was worth a try. She dropped the idea of working with spells. She didn't need one to manipulate the situation. She could do it like a human. They did it all the time so why couldn't she? It would certainly have a longer lasting effect. Spells wore off. They had a use-by-date. Real emotions were more effective. Anais decided she would broach the subject. She decided she would make the first move. They were sort-of family, but not really. It was healthier if she treated Nan as an equal. It was better if her and Nan became friends. Besides, all the anger cost her an enormous amount of energy, which eventually lead to nought. She would be better putting her energy into something more useful.

She put the Promptuary down, picked up the doll and placed on her bedside table. Its leg was contorted at a rank angle. She twisted the limb back into a more normal position.

If only relationships could be repaired as easily as plastic toys.

She stood and smoothed down the front of her dress. She made a similar mental adjustment, cracked open her bedroom door and walked down the corridor with the air of someone much older than she looked. 

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