I'm Kinda Gay Now?

43 3 0
                                    

You only see a play. A show. Basically , you only see what I want you to see. That smiling girl is gone. Her remains are careful around the world. I'm the dark side of the moon, trying to shine some moonlight on you. But it's getting harder. But I have to keep trying to shine some moonlight on the world.

I'm losing the war. It started with the battle. I've been losing. I'm fighting nothing. Wearing myself out. I can tell victory is far . But I'll never see it.

I'm dying. I'll never show it, but my spirt's gone . I need to go back home. I was never meant to be here. Help me go back home.

You'll never see it coming. Not just because I've been hiding the signs , but because you never saw my slips, or heard my screaming, or felt my cuts and scars. I'll never tell you, so read these carefully . The poems, the background, how long will it take for you to notice my faltering smile, so elusive. Notice the signs, help me .

I'm dying. Please see the signs. Just three little words. Are . You . Okay. Just a glimpse of the pain should show you the signs . To see what I'm going through. You act like I'm better off dead. Does it matter. When at midnight. I'm at Elysium.

It's not about you . Why can't you see . I'm fading away. Shadows absorbing me. The sun is gone. The moon is dim . I need you to see. The suffering I'm at. When you see. Will it be too late? I want you to see. I just can't say. This is my warning. That I'm going out. Embrace the darkness. It'll be what is left. Of me.

"I'm warm. " , ' I'm freezing. ' . " I'm full. " , ' I'm starving. ' . " No , I'm okay. " , ' It's hell . ' . My thinly veiled cries of pain, loud enough for you to hear it . But you don't. Look harder at me. The dead shell. Protecting the solider. Trying to fight. But losing the war.

Look at her. Remaining strong. Throughout pain and death. Barley falters. Not quite stoic, if you look hard. But you can decide. Whether to help.

It was only a day. But a day can hurt. Way too deep. Losing trust in others. Like a doe . Running from humans. Surrounding black. Beware. If it doesn't stop. It'll take her away.

Smiles melt to frowns. Glorious eyes turning dull . The girl you know. Is gone.

Her spirit is damaged. Beyond hope of fix . She's ready to run. But starting to die. Three words to say. To help her up .

Do not be me. I'm broken beyond repair. It will kill you to be me. No one would love a girl like me. Not with my voice. Not with my temper. Not with my weight. Not with my condition. Why do I even exist? !

I love him. But he doesn't see. Never will he love me.

My friends. My family. What are they to be when I'm gone. My life blood. Flowing away. The knife is too far deep for stitches and bandaids. Do not stop me. Unless your willing to help.

* * * * * * * *

For all of you who hurt and suffer from the world , this is for you. Especially two special friends. The names I will not say , but you know who you are. And Ne , hope you get out of the hospital. Don't hurt yourself again.

A Collection Of Self Written Poems.Where stories live. Discover now