Ripples in the Rain

Chapter Eleven

It had been a year and a half since I last saw Oscar. During the first few months, I was just living on automatic mode, playing my role as a dutiful parent and library employee. I kept my promise to myself and didn't contact him at all. He tried to call me a number of times, but I never picked up his calls. I avoided the cafe across my library where I saw him perform, even though it was a place I often visited for lunch. I avoided our local area religiously, just in case I accidentally ran into him or his family members. The other day I took the subway just to buy a jar of anchovies because Oscar took me to our local deli once, and I was worried that he might be there.

After Oscar's birthday party, I told my girls that he and I had broken up and they wouldn't be seeing him again. They were calm and very mature about the whole situation. They never mentioned his name again and acted like Oscar had never come into our lives.

My ex, Yves, called me the moment he heard about what had happened. He never thought Oscar was the right man for me and was furious that Oscar had broken my heart. We became closer because of that. He was still dating Juliette, but when she's busy, he took me to watch movies, plays and symphonies. Basically, he just wanted to keep me occupied. He was like a big brother to me, someone who was concerned of my well-being but didn't expect anything in return.

Three months ago, Yves introduced me to a Scottish writer called James Stewart. Yves was commissioned to design his house and they got along really well. James was kind, funny and most importantly, single and uncomplicated. I really enjoyed spending time with him. We went on a few dates and we both agreed to take things slowly. I hadn't even done anything further than kissing him! He never pressured me and was extra patient with me, even when I seemed distracted.

That Sunday afternoon, James dropped me and my girls home after taking us shopping at the markets. Both Sophie and Lucy adored him. James never had any children, but he was a natural with my girls. Because he was a writer, he didn't have set working hours and sometimes he picked the girls up from school and took them to a park for a play, followed by ice cream.

After the girls went inside our apartment, James pulled me aside and said, "Pippa, you know how much I like being with you."

I answered, "I like being with you as well, James. Very much."

I was being honest. James was like a light on a cloudy day. He made me stop thinking about Oscar. Oh, I guess I wasn't being entirely honest. I hadn't stopped thinking about Oscar. I missed him terribly. But it was easier to brush my thoughts aside when James made a joke or stayed with me till late watching 'Jane The Virgin' on TV. He was a very funny guy and he always made me laugh. He was also physically different from Oscar, which helped a lot. Oscar was olive skinned and he had black hair and dark eyes. James was light-skinned, blue eyed and brown-haired. The only similarity was probably their height. They were both almost the same height, both were quite petite, for a guy. They were just a little taller than I was.

"I know we're talking it slow, and I'm happy with that. But my parents are coming from Scotland this weekend, and I'm taking them to the Hamptons with me," he paused and then said, "Would you like to come, just for the weekend?"

I gave him a hug and kissed his cheek, "I'd love to. Thank you, James."

I made a note to call Yves immediately and ask him if he could take the girls for the weekend. I was sure that Yves wouldn't mind, he adored James as much as I did. After all, he was the one who introduced us to one another.

A few days later, I sat beside James, facing his parents, Catriona and Donald, eating my salmon dish at one of the famous local seafood restaurants in the Hamptons. Catriona and Donald were very friendly and approachable. They had a thick, beautiful sounding Scottish accent. To be honest, I had trouble understanding them at times. But when they talked about their hometown, their faces lit up. And so did James'. I knew he must be homesick. He told me he came from a small town in the Scottish Highlands. I saw some pictures of his hometown on the internet and they were beautiful.

It was an extremely warm day and after I gulped down my third glass of ice tea, I desperately needed to go to the toilet. I excused myself and went to the back of the restaurant. While I walked, I was busy fiddling with my phone - until I almost ran into a person. When I looked up to see who it was, I saw that it was Oscar, looking as beautiful as ever, just reasonably thinner. His face registered a similar level of shock as what I was feeling.

"Pippa," he said. "I can't believe it's you."

I could feel tears coming out of my eyes. There was so much that I'd like to say to him but the only thing I needed was to be enveloped in his strong arms again. I missed that feeling so much.

"Hi." That was the only word I could muster.

"I miss you," he said. "There were so many nights I wanted to just show up at your door and ring the bell."

"Don't say that," I said, placing my finger on his lips to silence him.

He grabbed my finger gently and kissed my hand. "I miss you so much."

My whole body trembled at his touch. But I didn't want to ruin everything I did to avoid him for the past one and a half year.

He looked at me, deeply and with so much emotion that I couldn't look away, even if I wanted to. And when he kissed me, in the restaurant where my boyfriend and his family was sitting just across the room, I couldn't resist. I kissed him back, with a passion I never knew existed before. And I hugged his body tight. And then we cried in each other's arms.

"I can't do this anymore, " Oscar said to me as he cupped my face in his hands. "Please tell me we can see each other again."

"I'm with someone else now," I said. "And so are you, by the way."

"I'm only with Alana because of my son, " Oscar said. "And I still resent her for keeping me away from you. We barely talk anymore."

"You look so skinny," I said, genuinely concerned about his weight. Not only did he look much slimmer, his face was more pale and his hair seemed less shiny.

"I'm fine," he said. "I'm keeping busy and taking on a lot of movie roles. I just sometimes forget to eat."

"I wish you'd look after yourself better," I said. "I've been following your career as much as I can."

"You have?" Oscar's face lit up. He held my hand and said, "I thought you didn't want anything to do with me."

"I never said that," I said. "I just wanted you to have a fair chance of being a Dad."

"I love being a Dad, " he said. "But I love you too, and I'm miserable without you."

I knew I had to go back to James and his parents but I couldn't take my eyes off Oscar.

"I have to go back to my table," I said as I squeezed his hand, " Take care, okay?"

He said, "I'm staying at my friend's house for the weekend but I'd love to meet you at The Montauk Point Lighthouse tonight, at 8 pm." He added, "There's usually no one there at that time and the view is amazing."

"I can't promise you anything, Oscar."

"Please,' he said as he looked at me with pleading eyes. "I will wait until you come. Even if it takes all night."

"What if it rains?" I asked.

"I will still be there, even if it snows."

He bit his lip as he let my hand go. "Please come.'

"I will try, Oscar, " I said. "I will try."