Taboo

Leave

I couldn't stop smiling the whole ride home. Wait. Why am I smiling? What has gotten in to me? oh my god.. I need to get this out of my head.. I can't be.. Stop thinking about it.

Before I knew it, I arrived at my house.. Here comes the drama.
I opened the door and it was dark, where is Jess? I went upstairs and I heard noises coming out of our room. When I opened the door I saw Jessica naked.. With another guy. I didn't know how to react, it's like the world just stopped. Am I mad? Am I sad? I feel nothing.

Jessica was begging for forgiveness, that she couldn't help it, that I didn't gave her any attention and she felt bad that I never spent time with her.

"Bruno please! Just say something!"
"Leave." Was the only thing leaving my mouth.
Jessica was still begging and then it hit me.

"LEAVE NOW! I DONT NEED YOUR SLUTTY ASS HERE." I yelled.
After many fake tears of her, she left with that guy.

Jessica cheated on me.
She has been cheating on me for a long time. How could I not know?
How could I be so blind?
How could I be so dumb? I should be sad, but no tears were leaving my eyes.
I should be mad, but I didn't feel like punching a wall.
I felt.. Relieved

I felt relieved that I didn't had to worry about my 'girlfriend' anymore.
That I didn't need to come home soon as I was done with my work. Now I can do whatever I want, no one telling me what to do, because we're over.

The next day

I woke up with a hangover.
Did I really drank that whole bottle of Moonshine? Damn.
I slept on the couch tonight. Hell no I would sleep at that bed where they.. Did it.
I have to change the sheets now. Ugh

I didn't feel like going to the studio today. I know that I'll get too stuck up and write a song about Jessica but I don't want to.
I wanna forget everything that happened yesterday.
Where can I go where no one finds me?

I got in the little store and bought some alcohol. I had a cap and sunglasses so that people wouldn't recognize me.
When I got out I was looking for a spot to sit and get drunk.
I saw a bench not that far away from the store and sat down. I opened the bottle of alcohol and drank it.
My phone was buzzing in my pocket, I grabbed my phone and saw some missed calls and people that texted me.

3 missed calls from Phil
15 missed calls from Jessica
6 texts from Jessica:
-Baby please pick up your phone, I wanna talk to you.
-Why aren't you picking up your phone??!!
-I understand that you're mad but please let me explain!!
-I love you
-We can work this out!
-I need you baby, please!

I don't have time for this shit. I turned off my phone and kept drinking.

It was getting dark. I drank the whole bottle of alcohol but I wanted more. As I struggled to get up and walk to the store someone bumped into me.
"Watch out where you walk." I said pissed.
"I'm sorry Bruno." The person said.

When I tried to look at the persons face I couldn't really see it because it was blurry and dark.
"It's me, Mike."
When I heard that I felt like my heart stopped for a moment. He walked me to the bench I sat minutes ago.

"Why are you drunk?" He asked me.
"Jus..just a lot going on in my life right..right now." I struggled talking.

"Do you wanna talk about it?" He asked and gave me a cigarette "This will sober you up a little."
"Thanks." I said. I smoked the cigarette and I felt much better. I leaned back and closed my eyes.
"I found my girlfriend cheating on me."
He was quiet for a while.
"That's fucked up." He said.
"You know what's more fucked up? I'm not mad. I actually do feel normal, it's like I already expected it."
"Then why are you getting drunk?" He asked.

I didn't know what to say. I was quiet.
"Maybe because lately I've been feeling feelings I've never felt before." I said.
"What feelings?" He asked me curious.
I wasn't sure what I was feeling.
"Normally when woman come up to me I would be all over them but lately.. Lately I haven't been very interested in them. I don't know what's gotten into me." I said a little frustrated.

I saw mike smiling.
"Why are you smiling?" I asked.

"I remember when I used to feel that way, I would always be flirting with girls and I would always fuck them if I wanted to, but when I turned 18 I wasn't interested anymore, they didn't turn me on anymore. First I thought something was wrong with me but later I knew why I've been acting that way."

"You.. You're gay."

Helloooo everyone. I know this story may suck but I wanted to write about this a loooong time. Love y'all x Kam