Trump Goes Down In The DM

Chapter 2

I knew what I should do next. She DMed me "Donald John Trump. You are more beautiful than an ass with shit spewed all over it.  You are the most inspiring shitter in the world. I bet in the bathroom, while you take a poo, there's so much, that it overflows. You know what you do with that extra chocolate? You make it into burgers. Poo burgers. I would absolutely LOVE to eat one of those burgers. I just wanted to share that with you. Thank you, Donald!"

I DM her back. "Gorgeous words, child. What is your name?" I take her words as a sincere compliment. It sounds very well thought out, and very genuine.

She DM's me back almost as soon as I send it. "MY NAME IS TRUMPFAN101." That reply disappointed me. She seems stupid. "That's your Instagram name, not your real name. Tell me your real name." I hope I didn't come across as creepy.

After about 5 minutes, she DMs me back, saying, "Donald, why are you texting my child? She doesn't like you, she doesn't know you, she doesn't CARE to know you, Nor do I. So please, stop asking for personal information. I have been informed of this already, because of her former attempts to contact you.  Again, don't contact us anymore from this point on."

I was confused by that. Me, causing problem? No. "Excuse me. I didn't do anything wrong, I was trying to make friends with her. I hope it didn't come across as creepy or weird, me trying to be friends with a 13 year old. I try to be friendly to virtually everybody. So please forgive me if I did anything seriously wrong." I DMed back.

"Wait. How do you know she's 13?" They DM me back.